May. 7th, 2014

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Some questions answer themselves.

Like typing into google the following question: "If I wire transfer money to a fugitive, can I be charged with aiding and abetting?".

I think the mere fact of feeling it necessary to type that question into a search engine probably means that it's a question I shouldn't even be exploring. Yes, Josh had a big cock, but he wasn't great enough in bed for me to face felony charges on his behalf. However, he has provided me with several days worth of free entertainment because the tale of his arrest was fucking hilarious. I kept trying not to laugh on the phone, but... he's a big dude. And the cops only managed to get one wrist in the handcuffs when he flailed out & hit one of the cops in the face (resisting arrest & assaulting an officer). He pulled a Braveheart & ran, yelling "Freedom!!!" The cops tased him three times - he got up the first two times & then the cops proceeded to beat the living crap out of him on the third. And he was drunk on Jaeger. Sooo many drunken arrest stories start out with, "Well, we were doing Jaeger shots..." I just have this mental image of this big huge drunken moron running off into the desert yelling, "Freedom!!!" The only way it could be funnier is if he was naked & painted blue. 

Luckily for my criminal record, today has been a day of false starts. We had two contractors out to give us quotes on fencing. Both told us 'oh, you don't need permits, because Code Enforcement never looks at these things... but if you want me to get the permits, it's going to cost $500". On the County website, it says the only fence you don't need permits for is if it's 2' or shorter, and retaining walls in back yards. Which means, yes, we do need permits and we've already had encounters w/Code Enforcement in our neighborhood, so they do check on things. So we have to submit a 'plat map' of our property with the planned outline of the fencing we're going to have put in. Lo and behold, no plat map is on record for this property. Yay. A professional surveyor would charge anywhere from $300 - $500 to create one. It seems like every time we look into getting this fence, we end up deeper & deeper down the red-tape rabbit hole. I mean, fuck, it's a fence. It's not like we're building a theme park up in this bitch.

We've also been thinking about tiling the house. Which means pulling out the carpet, moving furniture & being terribly inconvenienced until the job is done. And it will be performed by the mil, Rob & myself. Yeaaah, not gonna happen. We probably need permits for that, too.

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Rainbow Serpent Woman

August 2014

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