Aug. 16th, 2008

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Last night I was making another attempt at opening the lines of communication between myself & the Great Beyond. I lay there in the dark with my eyes closed, watching patterns of dots and lines and chevrons in the photo-negative colors behind my eyelids.

The dots coalesced into a full-blown image of a woman in a wheelchair, sitting slumped at her desk, writing or drawing. I'm pretty sure she was drawing or sketching. It was almost someone I recognized, but when I mentally said, "Whoa! Who is that?" the dots began to reform into faces and animal masks. A couple of the faces are familiar & keep reappearing, but the masks vary. Sometimes its Salish masks, other times they're African and sometimes they're very primitive and rough, made of tanned hide and teeth and tusks and antlers.

I think I may have solved the problem of the attacking buzzards. I have a ceiling lamp in my room. The blades are big & made to look like bamboo (they're really just textured plastic, but it matches my current decor, so I dun care) & I've been waking up in the middle of the night looking up at it. With the shadows it casts from the Amityville window, it looks like a huge circling bird. No matter how many times I wake up in the night, it startles me every fucking time. I figured out this little puzzle a couple of nights ago & I haven't been attacked by buzzards in my sleep since.

Today we're going to the buffet for my father-in-law's birthday. Tania is bringing James along... Tania originally wanted to have a big full-blown birthday party at her new apartment, but of course the mother-in-law put the kibosh on that little idea. I'm kind of glad, because it would have set a precedent for every other birthday. Tania loves parties, she's very social and outgoing, which is okay but I feel bad because she's going to find out the hard way just how anti-social the rest of her family is, including myself.

I got a weird fortune cookie a few weeks ago - I just now found it in my pants pocket.
"German proverb: No trees ever reach the sky." On the back it tells me how to say 'lettuce' in Chinese. So I got a wrong German proverb on a faked Chinese tradition that was probably made in some Korean factory.


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