Responsibility

I'm not used to it... lately I've really been having to be 'Head Night Auditor'. I'm not a very creative person, but I am good at tweeking other people's work - editing, proofreading, finding other people's mistakes. Can't find my own most of the time, but I can pinpoint someone else's & fix them with startling speed & accuracy - which is why I seem to be apt at night audit, even without any accounting degrees. However, all the mistakes I seem to be finding are those of my two other auditors - one of which won't be a relief night auditor much longer. If Alea keeps it up, tho, I'll have to train a second night auditor & a relief night auditor on top of it. And I feel bad, because I've talked to Alea & Shirla & asked them to please be more careful - we're under soooo much scrutiny from the impending merger. I leave notes, instructions, e-mails, and they keep missing things, forgetting things - and I catch them a month later when I basically have to do a month's worth of night audit paperwork to fix the damned problem. It's getting close to the end of the fiscal year, and all this shit has to be perfect so we can close everything out. I'm going to have to spend some extra time each week when I get back to work from my weekends & check over all the work from the previous three days... And it looks like I can no longer afford to be Ms. Nice Guy - I'm gonna have to start busting heads a little. I was ranting this morning: "I AM NOT THE ENFORCER!!!" - but I was wrong - I AM the enforcer, or I'll have to be, anyway. Fuck me running, good night auditors are hard to come by. When I call Nora to find out what I need to do for year end, I'm gonna ask her if I caused this many problems while I was relief auditor for her.

Been having a weird pain the past few days - on my right side, under my ribcage... What's there, anyway? The liver & stomach are on the left... the spleen? Gotta look it up in the anatomy books. I'm probably gonna start having to take the ulcer medication again. Either that, or that Gingerbread flavored Coffeemate isn't agreeing with me. Or maybe the Applebee's from Wednesday.

I thought I had something deep & reflective to add on, but I can't remember what the heck it was... stress. Gotta love it.