Reading taken from The Kabbalah Tree: A Journey of Balance & Growth by Rachel Pollack

There are 4 'worlds' or levels to the QBLH. Like the Sephiroth & pathways of the Kabbalistic Tree of Life, each level has its own associations and colors and experiences associated with it, and as a whole can be quite complex. Each realm is an emanation of the world above it, and a section of the Tree of Life is apportioned to each realm. Even though a section of the Tree is said to emanate from each realm, each realm also contains its own entire tree within it.

I've used the four worlds as a meditative and visualization device, but haven't worked with them as a concrete idea. While one can, at a stretch, associate various mundane activities or experiences of the mundane world to the higher worlds there is only one that is the actual 'real' world. The others are closer to the spiritual, intangible world, and connecting to them as a physical being is the hard part.

The four worlds are Atziluth (also spelled Atzilut), Beriah (Briah), Yetzirah (Yetsirah) & Assiyah (Assiah).

Atziluth is the 'highest' realm, closest to being pure divine energy. Kether, Binah and Chokmah emanate from Atziluth. Atziluth is considered masculine as it is active and projects everything else from it. Going into Judeo-Christian symbology, it is the 'Light' in 'Let there be Light!'. Without it, darkness would still be upon the waters. This is the source of the Tetragrammaton, YHVH and sacred names. The initial Yod of YHVH.

Beriah is the next world. It is the world of pure intellect and ideas - everything here is unformed and still in the planning stages. Chesed, Geburah and Tiphareth emanate from Briah. The Archangels dwell here. The initial Heh.

Yetzirah is the Astral Plane. Everything exists here, waiting to be born into the physical. It is the source of archetypes, the Collective Unconscious, and everything is symbolic. Netzach, Hod and Yesod emanate from Yetzirah. Regular ol' angels live here. Vau/Vav

Assiyah has but one sephirah, Malkuth, the Earth itself. It is the physical world, our world. Form is given flesh, ideas are manifested. The finial Heh.

The four suits and Court Cards of the Tarot are attributed to the four realms - Wands/Kings/Atziluth, Cups/Queens/Beriah, Swords/Knights/Yetzirah, Pentacles/Pages/Assiyah.

This is all over-simplified to give the Tarot reading some backbone, lol. I don't even know why I decided to do this reading, because it's been a long time since I delved into the four realms, and I'm not sure how to apply the cards to the reading, or how to apply the symbolism to myself.

My question: Who am I, and why am I here?

Atziluth
Who am I? The Tower
So in the formless, primordial Light of Atziluth, I am the Destroyer of Worlds. Nice. I call The Tower 'shaken foundations'. It's usually a revelation of something so devastating or life-changing that it rocks the foundations of the querent to the core. In my recent pathworking, I've found myself adding bits & pieces to my notes on the cards, and it came to me that The Tower is a good symbol of people or cultures or societies that rely on single things for survival - like monoculture farming. If that one thing is removed or destroyed, it leads to collapse.

Why am I here? IV of Swords, reversed
Opposition, Unrest, Avarice, Circumspection, Precaution, Testimony, Quarantine, Depression. Long illness. Forced isolation. Possible imprisonment or hospitalization. Good opportunities. Tread carefully & use discretion. Familial problems. Make no promises. Renewed activity. Social unrest. Other people bring renewing energy to Seeker. Sleeping Beauty's Prince Charming. Failure of peaceful negotiation. Excommunication. Plans of revenge manifest themselves in daydreams.

Beriah:
Who am I? IV of Pentacles, reversed
In the world of conception and ideas, I fail.
Opposition, Delay, Spendthrift, Shortsightedness, Stasis, Loss, Obstacles. Inability to delegate authority. Clinging to old ways. Avoiding action for fear of loss. Make new plans. Inability to hold life together or give it meaning.

Why am I here? V of Cups, reversed
Hope, Meeting, Ancestry. Unexpected anxieties & unforeseen problems. Unwanted changes to way of life. Things are looking up. New courage. Consider new job or home. Build new ideas or plans. New alliances. Return of old flame. Courage in the face of obstacles. False projects. Relationship not working out as hoped. Remorse. Disappointment.

Yetzirah
Who am I? X of Wands
This one is pretty straight-forward. This is who I am.
Jadedness, Exhaustion, Despair, Disguise, Pressure, Changes, Overwork, Burdens, Responsibilities, Resentfulness. Do not carry every one else's burdens. Succumbing before the onslaught of inevitable forces. Difficulties of success. Burden of worry. One who carries an oppressive load. Weak heart, loss of spirit. Ruined plans. Dark before the dawn. Hope based on the ability to imagine a better situation. Willingness to do everything & anything to make a situation work. Being paralyzed by overwork & heavy responsibility, sometimes as an excuse to avoid doing anything truly constructive, including getting out of a bad situation. Inability to disseminate responsibility among others. Perseverance to meet impossible goals. Overburdened. Searching.

Why am I here? Death
In Yetzirah, I am here to change.

Assiyah
Who am I? Ace of Cups
Joy, Peace, Health, Inspiration, Contentment, Gifts, Birth, Receptivity, Pleasure, Happiness. Emotional fulfillment. Getting in touch with your roots. Beginning of a relationship or friendship, possibly a wedding leading to a happy marriage. Beginning of all good things. New understanding of a spiritual matter. House of the true heart. Inner light. Changes result in happiness. Love affair. Attend to small details. Womb of life. First true intimacy in a love relationship. Heart or third eye opening up. Beginning of love & pleasure. Influence of the Great Mother or being blessed by any of the love-related deities. Richness of feeling. Fertility.

Why am I here? King of Wands, reversed
Sounds like my parents.
Someone who is narrow-minded, Quarrelsome, Unreasonable, Seeking Out or Creating Battles or Opposition. Frustration, Indecision, Discord, Brutality, Rupture, Dissension, Diversion. Restriction of minor duties. Lack of energy. Encouragement needed. Follow your conscience. Jealousy causes odd behavior. Interrupted work. Time to check progress toward goal- something may have changed. Someone who pursues you for weeks then disappears. Running from commitment or a preference for shallow & casual relationships. Dangerous atmosphere.

1 - The Magician
I THE MAGICIAN / DR. JOHN / THE CONJUROR The Principle of Communication & Timing As Above, So Below
Chakra:	Crown Chakra	Element:	Air
Color:	Yellow	Planet:	Mercury Learning, Study and Communication
Musical Tone:	E	Sphere:	Hod
Path:	12 - From Kether to Binah	Letter:	Beth - House
Number:	1	Plants:	Astragalus, Palm, Lemon
Perfumes:	Mastic	Stones:	Opal, Agate
Metals:	Mercury	Zodiac:	Gemini
Intelligence:	The Clear or Transmitting Intelligence	Rune:	Peorth - The Dice Cup Gambling, Speculation, Risk Placing yourself in the hands of another.
Animals:	Swallow, Fish, Ibis & Ape - sacred to Thoth	Deities:	Hermes, Thoth, Mercury, Athena, Merlin, Odin
Symbols: Ouroboros - the Transformer One hand raised, one lowered - "As Above, So Below" Red Roses - the Five Senses, Desire Robe - Outer persona Lily - One Truth, Knowledge, Purity Wand, Cup, Sword & Disk - the Four Elements Wand - Phallic symbol		Career: Physician Architect Inventor Research Scientist Magus Stage Magician Symphony Conductor Messenger Drummer
Key Words: Action; adaptation; address; animus; articulation; balance; betrayal; charisma; commitment; consciousness; crafts; creation; creativity; communication; consciousness; criticism; cunning; deceit; dexterity; diplomacy; direction; disgrace; efficiency; ego; expression; failure; hesitation; illusions; indecision; individuality; ineptitude; information; innovation; leadership; madness; mischievousness; nervousness; observation; organization; originality; pain; personality; reason; reflection; science; self-confidence; self-reliance; skepticism; skill; strong-willedness; subtlety; talks; trickery; untrustworthiness; verbosity; will; will-power; wisdom
Upright: Planning will become manifest in the material. Balances in duality. Logic & our ability to translate intelligence. Ability to use & manifest higher powers. Consummate skill in the matter at hand. Ability to see root causes clearly. Opportunity to use talents. Merging of the Four Elements. Everything is possible through the Will of the Gods. Making something tangible out of the possibilities of life. Give life meaning & direction. The person who takes that which is offered by this card shows signs of being an architect, inventor, or creator. Applications of faith & will are the formula for success & blessing. Reaching for a goal, one over which you have control. Someone who lets only truly qualified people enter their world. Metaphysical connection between you & one who hides things from you in order to hold power over you. Awareness of the power in life. Action rather than reaction. A sense of self. Focusing attention on a project or single goal. Singleness of purpose. Being in control. Manual ability. Organizational skill. Using writing, speaking, persuasion & knowledge. Use of rhythm to call the spiritual into the Visible. A need to get your message across to a wider audience. Guidance, new opportunities, creative initiative. Mastery of self. Readiness to put plans into action, time to use your skills. Great power & energy at your disposal. Strong ego. Magic work. Gradual change.
Contrary: Abuse of power. Misapplication of self. Lack of will-power. Avoidance of obstacles. Poor planning. Enemy snares. Devious manipulation. Inability to articulate thoughts. Manipulation of words & deeds for self-gain. Change is needed for achievements. Situation needs probing. Poor judgment leads to loss. You have control over the situation - the future is in your hands. Fear of channeling energy in a new direction can ease fear of madness or losing control. Hypocrisy within the Self.

Male
Female
Asexual
Androgyne
Hermaphrodite
Gay
Bisexual
Transgender
Transexual

Magic, back in the day when the Tarot cards were first blended with magical theory, had a rather simple view of gender. It had yin/yang, male/female, positive/negative, black/white, active/passive. Basically they are polar opposites, each attribute associated with planetary influences, masculine & feminine deities, construction and destruction. This was the world view at the time - you were either male or female, and androgynes and hermaphrodites were not known well enough or understood well enough to be taken into consideration. Cross-dressers and transexuals were relatively common, and to an extent even gender reassignment in the form of castrated men living as women. They were not really seen as being 'magically important', although there were androgynous & hermaphroditic magical constructs, like Baphomet, used in various types of magic.

I usually refer to The Fool as 'he' because most of the artwork used is vaguely masculine. In reality, The Fool is androgynous or asexual. 'It' lacks the experience, self-awareness and self-knowledge to know what 'it' is yet. The Fool has even less awareness of its sexuality than an infant because The Fool doesn't even bother to mess with what's between its legs. The Fool doesn't even have the ability to project itself onto the people it meets to know who it finds attractive or interesting. It begins life as asexual, not having tried enough to know that it doesn't like sexual relationships in any form, and because of this blank-slatedness, it appears to other people as androgynous, too innocent and vague to be attractive in and of itself.

The Magician is a self-aware man, but his sexuality is less based on societal roles for a man and more based on innate nature. The Magician is the pure essence of testosterone. He creates because he is driven to create, like a stag or a stallion is driven to sire offspring. Pan is behind it all, pushing him onward and forward, phallus erect, palms outward, that pure spring of masculine force flowing from him. He has drawn down the Sun into himself and fertilizes all that he touches. Sprouts spring from seeds, wombs fill, cities leap to the skies, planets appear from dust.

The Magician is not a mature man. He is more like a boy who has just hit puberty, 'young, dumb & full of cum'. He is the energy within us that drives us to change things for the sake of change. People who seem to thrive on chaos and drama are embodying the mindless active principle of The Magician. Change means growth and new life, even if it destroys and old, stable life. Without The Magician's powers things do stagnate and fall apart on their own, but that hectic activity hastens the process.

It is not until The Magician grows into The Emperor that the creative forces are harnessed into constructive action. The Emperor still creates, but at a slower and more nurturing pace. He has feminine forces in The Empress to temper his abandon and his Panic lust. The Magician discovers and invades new territory but The Emperor makes sure the border fortresses become empires. The Magician creates children, but the Emperor fathers them.

I don't want to move on to the Magician. I want to keep hanging out with the Fool. The Fool's tired of me following him around, but...

When I'm walking around with the Fool, I don't have to actually do anything. I can look at stuff, I can people-watch. I can take it all in, like a tourist. I don't have to participate. The Magician has to be involved, has to be emotionally invested in what he's doing. The Fool does not.

The Fool is a tramp, a bum. He can watch others do the work and sample the results but he doesn't have to care about anything. He can move on, from one experience to another. The Fool can be stuck in that lifestyle and it doesn't matter.

The Magician is less about thinking and absorbing, and more about doing.

0 - The Fool
Principle of Courage, Ecstasy and Peak Experiences "If a person does not keep pace with his companions, perhaps it is because he hears a different drummer. Let him step to the music he hears, however measured or far away." - Henry David Thoreau
Chakra:		Element:	All and none. Air
Color:	Pale yellow	Planet:	The Universe, Uranus - signifies originality and eccentricity.
Musical Tone:	E	Sphere:	Kether
Path:	11 - from Kether to Chokmah	Letter:	Aleph - the Bull or Ox
Number:	0	Plants:	Ginseng, Ash, Yggdrasil and other World Trees
Perfumes:	Galbanum	Stones:	Geodes, Agate, Iron Pyrite (Fool's Gold)
Metals:	Aluminum, Titanium	Zodiac:	The entire Zodiac; Aquarius, Uranus
Intelligence:	The Fiery Intelligence	Rune:	Sigel - Rune of the Glittering Sun The life force, warmth, health, harmony
Animals:	Eagle - Objectivity; Otter - Playfulness; Monkeys & Apes - resemblance to humanity	Contemplation:	The first manifestation of focused possibility. Zero as the nothingness necessary for creation.
Symbols: Zero/Null - unlimited potential, the World Egg, the womb Feather - Maat Wreath - Victory of the Spirit White Rose - Clarity, Purity Wallet - where past experiences are stored Divided Circle - Kether, the Tuat Knotted Belt - the Zodiac Sun - Child of the Divine Dog - psychopomp, reminder of humanity, reality Wand - phallic symbol		Deities: Coyote Loki Hermaphrodite Anansi Eleggua as the Holy Child of Atocha Maat Attis Dionysus and the Maenads Bacchus Christ Buddha Other tricksters and dying Gods
Key Words:
	Absence; adventure; apathy; beginnings; carefreeness; carelessness; craziness; creation; crossroads; delirium; distribution; divinity; ecstasy; energy; expression; extravagance; folly; foolishness; frenzy; health; ideals; ignorance; imbalance; impracticality; indirection; indiscretion; inexperience; innocence; intoxication; intuition; invention; irresponsibility; joy; mania; misfit; naivety; negligence; optimism; originality; prophecy; protection; purity; risk; spirituality; spontaneity; stagnation; stimulation; surprise; swiftness; thought; strength; thoughtlessness; unconventionality; uninhibitedness; unrealism; unworldliness; vanity; visions; vitality; youth
Upright:
	The unexpected, a surprise. Divine influence. Sexuality expressed without guilt, dishonesty, or connivance. All things are possible to the person ready to go in any direction. New beginnings. Start of a new cycle of activity. Creative dreamer. Hidden talents. A decision. Leap before you look. Lessons of Attis, Dionysus & Bacchus. Today is the first day of the rest of your life - go anywhere, do anything, be anyone. Possible death. Constant reminders of the material world & bliss in not being a part of it. Someone who is naturally telepathic. Avoid sticking to definite plans & just let things happen. Be idealistic & open yourself to adventure & new avenues. Allow relationships to develop spontaneously. Be free-spirited. Optimism unaffected by past events. Purity of purpose. Impulsive thoughts & actions. Unconventional way of looking at things. Unexpected or unplanned event may be about to happen. Leaping to a new phase in life. Being open to experience. Acting on impulse. Childlike enthusiasm. Being foot-loose & fancy-free. Choices made seem foolish to others. Letting go & trusting in the Universe. Living in the here & now. Travel & vagabondage. Need for caution, but remain confident. A new chapter opening in one's life. Start of a phase, leap of faith, openness to life. The beginnings of a new cycle or enterprise. A matter that is unexpected or unplanned. Moving in a different direction, heading toward an unknown future. Use hidden talents. Creative currents bursting forth. Possible disruption of physical matters. New cycle.
Contrary:
	Misplacement & misunderstandings. Problems arising from recklessness or ill-considered decisions. Immature or irrational actions. Poor application of energy. Review choices. Don't cry over spilt milk. Listen to yourself. Overcome fears. Reaching the end of a cycle- time for a new goal. Scattered energy. Failure to follow instincts. Not taking a chance at a critical moment because of fear. Dependence on the opinions & plans of others. Awareness that great chances must be taken when timely. Foolish decisions & unwise actions. Pleasure-seeker. Sexual focus. Lack of confidence. Need to take more responsibility & balance pleasures, sexuality & other desires. Unkind friends.

I know I promised free short Tarot readings this weekend - no one responded, but just in case...

I'm not at my best atm due to my broken toof. I get random moments of what feels like someone spiking me through the tooth & into my brain with a large screwdriver or something. Not that I've ever had a screwdriver plunged into my skull, but I imagine this pain is similar. It is intense and localized, and it just stops me in my tracks. I get it pulled on Tuesday, so maybe next weekend for Tarot readings?

I'm trying this whole cross-posting thingy. Bear with me.

30th Day of the 30 Days of Books Memes: What am I reading now?

Currently, I've got Marion Zimmer Bradley's The Fall of Atlantis at work, and Terry Pratchett's The Color of Magic in the bathroom. The Fall of Atlantis is pretty standard MZB stock. Lots of secret black rites and incestuous goings-on. The Color of Magic travels between my bathroom & bedroom. TCoM is actually painful to read for me right now because I want to bust out laughing on every other page, and my throat hurts, and laughter starts me off on a coughing fit. I don't know why I've avoided Prachett's books all this time.

My favorite bit, so far involves a seedy wizard describing his traveling companion to an infamous pair of scoundrels: ..."Let's just say that if complete and utter chaos were lightning, then he'd be the sort to stand on a hilltop in a thunderstorm wearing wet copper armor and shouting 'All gods are bastards'...". This is my style of reading. My inner Coyote is pleased.

In honor of my new journaling home, I'm going to make good on my 'free Tarot reading' promise. On Sept. 12, 13 & 14 I will perform short (meaning 3 - 7 cards) readings for my fans and friends. Formulate a question & either post a comment here, on the crosspost to LJ, or PM it to me. Let me know if you want me to share your reading w/the world or if you'd like a private response.

I have the following decks to choose from:

The New Orleans Voodoo Tarot

Classic Rider-Waite - and I do mean Classic - I found one published in 1971 on e-Bay to replace the deck that mysteriously disappeared.

The Medicine Cards - more of an oracle, less of a fortune-telling thing

The Tarot of the Dead - since Samhain/Hallowe'en/Dia de los Muertos is right around the corner, I have to admit I'm kind of looking forward to getting to know this deck better.

The H. P. Lovecraft Tarot - I cannot be held responsible for anything these cards tell you. Io! Io! Cthulhu F'taghn!

I asked facade.com's Tarot... I chose the Aquatic Tarot, & facade.com chose the Twisting Path spread for me.

The Twisting Path spread provides insight into the path ahead of you and the choices you must make. This is the spread for situations where more than one pitfall may lie ahead. The Aquatic Tarot is a modern watercolor interpretation of the classic Rider Waite symbolism. It is rapidly becoming one of the most popular decks, due to both its spectacular beauty and its traditional imagery.

The card at the lower left, represents the first decision along your path.

Five of Cups (Disappointment), when reversed:
Accepting a loss. Overcoming sadness and grief to get on with your life. Realizing the value of what you still have. Dissatisfaction gives way to a new hope and understanding. May allude to a broken relationship or tragedy. May also refer to a gift, inheritance, opportunity, partnership, or marriage that has fallen below expectations.

The card to the far left represents the first false path that may lead you astray.
Five of Swords (Defeat), when reversed:
Refusing to achieve success through personal degradation. Friendship maintained through the abandonment of a dishonorable gain. Slander and infamy avoided.

The card in the middle represents the second decision along your path.
Six of Swords (Science), when reversed:
Conceit and intellectual pride. Being stuck in a problem which has no apparent solution. Frustration and anxiety that are left unsettled. Travel and exploration are delayed.

The card at the lower right represents the second false path that may lead you astray.
Ace of Wands, when reversed:
The seed of a new crisis - perhaps as yet unseen. The start of an explosive situation threatening to consume all who get too close. The herald of birth, invention, or upheaval. An innate and primal force unleashed. May suggest a surge of vitality, creativity, or fertility that can set dangerous events in motion.

The card at the top represents one possible mask of your true destination.
Four of Pentacles (Power):
Cleaving to earthly power in the desperate fear that it will be lost. Making yourself an obstacle to progress due to lack of originality and a desperate fear of change. Believing that security and identity are based primarily on the possession of material things. Coveting things and people. Living in a cloud of suspicion and prejudice.

Accurate to the point of creepy, but still no answers.

Got a new set of Rider Waite Tarot today.

I dun like 'em. They're slick, my old pack was more matte. The colors are too bright. The Magician keeps gravitating to the top of the deck (or bottom, really - the visible side, anyway). The edges are stiff and hurt my fingers. I got them at Borders, so they have the 'new card' smell instead of smelling at least like the inside of an occult shop. They're slippery.

I've been trying to work with the other cards in my collection, but none of them feel right to me. The Robin Wood deck is too boisterous, and honestly has some bad-tasting associations with the images, the Thoth deck is just too fucking huge, the porn decks are... well, they're for titillation at bachelorette parties, not real divinatory tools. The Halloween & Dead deck - I can't jive with the symbols. Anthropomorphized vegetables & movie reels just don't make any sense.

Argh! I hate when stuff like this happens!