Just Stuff

My job scared the crap outta me today, which was a cruel thing considering that I am still technically on vacation.

Last night I got a phone call from HR saying I needed to come in & sign for a package that had been delivered, and could I come in at 10:30am? I said, sure, and this morning we went out there, about a half hour late (not entirely our fault - traffic was horrible). So I get there & there is a line of people signing for a gift (which was a bunch of Excalibur merchandise). I was prepared to be pissed - they kept me up for this? An Excalibur sweat shirt, ball cap & duffel bag? Bastards.

Anyway, the HR lady sees me & says, "Oh, Janelle, come back here." So I go through the door & she's shuffling me around in the HR office, peeking around corners & into offices & crap. She tells me to have a seat in an empty office & says she has to find the packet. Now I'm thinking, oh, w/her accent, I misunderstood 'packet' for 'package'. Then I happen (well, ok, I'm nosy, whaddaya want - leave me in an empty office...) to see someone's cash turn-in slip in a folder on the desk, along w/notepads & other officious looking things. Someone came & got me, & I see the HR lady disappear around the corner w/what I thought was a tape recorder. I started to get nervous - there have been a lot of managerial meetings involving the legal team going on, and a lot of changes due to MGM's takeover... so I'm standing there while this other woman starts turning me around to look at my sweater - a stalling tactic & she obviously didn't want me looking down that hallway. So I let her fondle my fuzzy Snuffalupagous-fur sweater, and finally they steer me down the hallway. I see a sea of suits behind a slightly open door, and then I saw...

Balloons!!!

I am 'Simply the Best'!!! There's a banquet tomorrow for all us lucky bastards!

Anyway, after all that nerve-wracking social retardation (when I went through the door I gave the football-player wave "You're number 1, mom!"), hair all fucked up, carrying a bag w/a dirty uniform in it that I didn't have the sense to set down, being filmed - the thing I thought was a tape recorder was actually a video camera... wheeee

We went to check the mail & I have a very small package containing an even smaller envelope. I got my lovely seeds again - Deadly Nightshade, Jimsonweed, and some 5X Salvia divinorum, Diviner's Sage, Ska Maria, Ska Pastoress... the Shepherdess of the wild hills way. And a bonus, something called 'Ice Plant'. I know (well, knew) nothing about Ice Plant, Mesembryanthemum nodiflorum but now I understand that its primary active component, mesembrine, is an SSRI. I'll be putting this stuff into a little bottle & forgetting about it. Paxil was an SSRI and I really don't feel the need to have flourescent lights burning my brain through my eye sockets again, or having my skin hurt because the air is too heavy. I haven't had the Paxil in months and I still have some sensitivity issues - can't stand the way chewing stands, the way certain foods feel in my mouth, the way paper feels against my fingertips... ech.

Many sites, such as the Vaults of Erowid, say that many people don't enjoy the effects of S. divinorum, that it is too hard on them psychically & emotionally. I'm going to be protected in a circle of Salvia officinalis & sweet grass, with some Afro Celts playing softly in the background & Rob watching to make sure I don't take my travels into the physical world. I've got some work to do & some interior doors to unlock, and I'm just hoping my skepticism (it's a SAGE, for cripes sake, Labiatae... it's a cooking spice!) doesn't kill my buzz, so to speak.

We're thinking, after Ed gets a new tank, of maybe trying an indoor greenhouse in Ed's old tank. More of a controlled environment. And I'm going to treat the potting soil for snail eggs before I plant a single thing.

Anyway, back to WoW. Zane the Magnificent is a lvl 23 hunter w/a lvl 23 hecklefang hyaena named Jinx. We pwn Ragefire!!!

Dies Natalis Solis Invictus!

Well, we started to watch 'The Brothers Grimm' & Rob's mom called. We were in the middle of dinner. He's on the phone w/her now, arguing about his nephew's dad & his sister. Sooo, while he's been arguing, I've been straightening up my room, creating a safe, sacred space.

Contrary to what anyone may believe about me, or what I may have led others to believe about me, I don't have much experience with true hallucinogens. I understand that what one takes into the 'trip' is often connected to what their surroundings are like, so I picked up all my laundry, put away some of the clutter that's been just sitting there next to my bed. Moved the phones away from the bed so the only piece of electronics that is nearby is my CD/clock thingy. I blew the ash & dead matches & joss sticks & dust off the center of my altar & lit some Nag Champa in there. I picked up the softener sheets from the floor & tossed them, put the hot water bottle in the bathroom, I'm going to have to find somewhere else to put the electric fan. I just get the feeling that I don't want anything alien-looking or too mechanical nearby. I'm worried about the iron & ironing board - I may move it into the den for the night. I am afraid of anything that may appear monstrous. So I've turned my room into a mental sanctuary, ready for my journey.

So then as I was standing there, anointing a white candle w/dragon's blood oil, it struck me again that tonight is Solstice night. So as I was anointing the candle, I was chanting in my head, "Dies natalis Solis invictus! Sun God, Sun God, Ra, Ra, Ra!" It was as if I could hear a Roman legion beating their shields & shouting it with me.

Earlier on WoW, on Barrens chat (of course, couldn't say it in UC) I blurted out "I have this deep need to wish everyone a Merry Solstice!" I got so many responses, a lot of them ending w/things like, "Hey, I'm not the only one!" & "There are more of us!" Wow has some amazing imagery in their elfin lands - these stags just north of the Barrens, in Ashenvale - holy moly! Rob's character has a totem that attracts enemy creature's attention - I was almost sick because one of those stags attacked us & was rapidly killing us, so we had to fight back. The stags, even high level ones, don't normally attack. There's a druid sanctuary, and just outside it was 'The Shrine of Remulos'. By the Gods, it is breathtaking in its own CGI way. I wish I could find a decent screenshot of it - it's a tree in the form of a woman, and in front of her is a half-man, half-stag.