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Fear Again
Aug. 26th, 2006 08:04 am
I may be afraid of my own house.
I may be afraid of the dark.
I may be afraid that I am completely, stark raving mad sometimes. Like real mad, like schizophrenia-mad.
I may be afraid of growing older & becoming too infirm to choose my own death.
But I am not afraid of terrorists, terrorism, bombs, plots, Al Qaeda, Osama bin Laden, Hezbollah, airline security breaches or any of the multitudinous things the media has been telling me to be afraid of lately.
I tell you what I am afraid of - I am afraid of fear. I am afraid of hysteria and panic. I am afraid of what happens when a government and its politicians know that the people they 'serve' are afraid and on the verge of panic.
Maybe it's because, for lack of a firmer label, I am a witch. Maybe one of my past lives was during the Spanish Inquisition or the witch trials of the Middle Ages... or maybe I once lived during the McCarthy era when there was a Communist in every closet. Maybe it's because I grew up in the Cold War... Maybe it's my imagination telling me that I do indeed still have an imagination & some creativity.
I made the mistake of watching the news this morning. On the news, they showed footage of a man sitting behind a desk & other men coming up to him. I wasn't paying very close attention - I had cous cous salad in front of me, and blintzes, so I was a bit distracted. They may have been raising a hand or signing a document, I don't honestly know. However, when the smiling blonde lady came on & said, "Even though you can't hear it, these men are pledging allegiance to Osama bin Laden & Al-Qaeda." I looked up then, fast enough that my neck creaked. I wondered, "if we can't hear it, how exactly do we, the viewers, know for certain what these men are involved in?" Then I looked around at the other diners in the EDR. Everyone was watching the news intently & beginning to discuss what they had just seen. They were all relieved to learn that the 'man behind the desk' was a covert FBI operative. Everyone was suddenly afraid of this 'terrorist cell' revealed to them by some woman with an incredible amount of hairspray on her head. I came to the startling and depressing realization that I was probably the only person questioning what I was watching.
Question everything.
I may be afraid of the dark.
I may be afraid that I am completely, stark raving mad sometimes. Like real mad, like schizophrenia-mad.
I may be afraid of growing older & becoming too infirm to choose my own death.
But I am not afraid of terrorists, terrorism, bombs, plots, Al Qaeda, Osama bin Laden, Hezbollah, airline security breaches or any of the multitudinous things the media has been telling me to be afraid of lately.
I tell you what I am afraid of - I am afraid of fear. I am afraid of hysteria and panic. I am afraid of what happens when a government and its politicians know that the people they 'serve' are afraid and on the verge of panic.
Maybe it's because, for lack of a firmer label, I am a witch. Maybe one of my past lives was during the Spanish Inquisition or the witch trials of the Middle Ages... or maybe I once lived during the McCarthy era when there was a Communist in every closet. Maybe it's because I grew up in the Cold War... Maybe it's my imagination telling me that I do indeed still have an imagination & some creativity.
I made the mistake of watching the news this morning. On the news, they showed footage of a man sitting behind a desk & other men coming up to him. I wasn't paying very close attention - I had cous cous salad in front of me, and blintzes, so I was a bit distracted. They may have been raising a hand or signing a document, I don't honestly know. However, when the smiling blonde lady came on & said, "Even though you can't hear it, these men are pledging allegiance to Osama bin Laden & Al-Qaeda." I looked up then, fast enough that my neck creaked. I wondered, "if we can't hear it, how exactly do we, the viewers, know for certain what these men are involved in?" Then I looked around at the other diners in the EDR. Everyone was watching the news intently & beginning to discuss what they had just seen. They were all relieved to learn that the 'man behind the desk' was a covert FBI operative. Everyone was suddenly afraid of this 'terrorist cell' revealed to them by some woman with an incredible amount of hairspray on her head. I came to the startling and depressing realization that I was probably the only person questioning what I was watching.
Question everything.
