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Practicing Peace
Dec. 23rd, 2007 08:00 am
Ok, so I've been trying to put some Buddhism into my every day work. It's part of why I went back to the front desk (yah, yah, laugh all ya want). I felt I had isolated myself to the point where I couldn't actually practice being Buddhist. Being Buddhist when you're alone is easy. Try doing it in a crowd of people who all want something from you that you cannot give them.
In some ways, it has been helping me just be nicer. Lovingkindness, all one word. I am an exceptional liar - I can tell people to have a safe journey, or happy holidays or a peaceful flight and sound like I really mean it. In some ways, I do honestly mean it, and sometimes I even feel like I mean it. Sometimes people give me these really surprised looks and return my greeting - with feeling, as my band instructors would say.
I came to the determination last night that my Buddhist practice only lasts about 7 hours. I worked a 12 last night - actually volunteered for a 12. My body doesn't hurt that bad, but I am ashamed at my behavior. I purposefully, intentionally and with malice aforethought launched into a screaming match with some poor Japanese tourist who wanted to be on a higher floor. I was just so tired. Tired of not having any rooms, tired of people whining, tired of people who were blaming me for their crappy flights, long drives, crying babies, global warming, etc & so forth. And I reacted instead of acted. Bad, bad n00b-Buddhist.
Eh, more bad Karma. All I can do is be.
In some ways, it has been helping me just be nicer. Lovingkindness, all one word. I am an exceptional liar - I can tell people to have a safe journey, or happy holidays or a peaceful flight and sound like I really mean it. In some ways, I do honestly mean it, and sometimes I even feel like I mean it. Sometimes people give me these really surprised looks and return my greeting - with feeling, as my band instructors would say.
I came to the determination last night that my Buddhist practice only lasts about 7 hours. I worked a 12 last night - actually volunteered for a 12. My body doesn't hurt that bad, but I am ashamed at my behavior. I purposefully, intentionally and with malice aforethought launched into a screaming match with some poor Japanese tourist who wanted to be on a higher floor. I was just so tired. Tired of not having any rooms, tired of people whining, tired of people who were blaming me for their crappy flights, long drives, crying babies, global warming, etc & so forth. And I reacted instead of acted. Bad, bad n00b-Buddhist.
Eh, more bad Karma. All I can do is be.
