perzephone | I Want to Die. (Reply)

Right now. Quickly. I was hitting the codeine pretty hard the week (maybe 2 weeks?) prior to having my toof pulled. Then Tuesday, I pinched a nerve in my shoulder/neck area so I kept taking the pills even though the toof was gone & mostly healed by Weds. I haven't taken any yesterday or today and I am sick as a... well, as a junkie going through withdrawals. My blood pressure is waaaaay up there, too, nauseous, headachey, muscle achey - I feel like I've got a brain-crushing flu. I thought maybe it was just because the class gave me anxiety, or maybe because the lights were out for three hours & I was staring at a projected computer screen (which always kills my eyes), but a Mike's Hard Lemonade after work and a hot bath relieved the residual anxiety, I've been in well-lit areas for at least 8 hours... I've been drinking fluids all day & not peeing much, which is always a little alarming, but I'm not getting puffy. If anything dehydration is probably contributing to the headache.

Gods, I want to die. I wasn't even taking it for that long to feel this shitty. What's worse is that it only took the edge off my tooth pain. Even my rotted-tooth-pain-feeling-spasming-muscle arm only feel a little warmer & fuzzier than not taking it. Of course, the regular Tylenol wasn't even taking the edge off anything, so mild relief was far more relieving than no relief. At least the codeine made eating bearable, as long as it was room temperature & mushy.