Stuff, Always Stuff

Sometimes I wonder just how far I can push myself, and then I push myself a little farther. It helps, sometimes, when I have someone I can legitimately blow up at a little, like this woman who keeps calling here playing phone games. I understand the psychological term 'fugue state', because that's kind of what I've been in since May. A fugue state, where I left a former personality behind & picked up this insane alter-ego that now dominates who I am. So purely driven, driven on, day after day, this total immersion in a waking state, fueled by coffee. And because I'm awake all the time, I'm hungry all the time, so I'm getting fatter by the minute. Someone asked me "When's it due?" the other day - I looked down at my round toe-hiding gut, looked up at the clock & said, "Oh, about 5 or 6 hrs..."