Another Meful Quiz

When I was in high school, I could pound out a decent essay on just about any subject in a matter of a few hours. I used to love it when teachers only wanted 1 - 3 pages. I rarely needed padding, and I could come up with something to turn in, on time & usually early. Now I sit in front of my computer & beat my head on the keyboard. Supposed to write an essay for History, and I had a choice of either why the Treaty of Versailles was rejected by the U. S. Congress, or how American ideals changed after FDR's New Deal. Rob & I were talking about the whole New Deal deal the other day, and it's material I'm relatively familiar with, but when I sat down to write, not a word flowed from my fingertips. I finally gave in & went for the Treaty of Versailles question. It was hard to pound out three paragraphs on that because it can be summed up in one sentence: "Congress rejected the Treaty of Versailles because they wanted to prevent the U. S. from getting involved in foreign entanglements created by the League of Nations". That's pretty much it. And I had to stretch that fucker out to 2 pages. Holy crap. 

Then, because I needed to get it done, I worked on the rough draft of my book report. It's only supposed to be 3 pages long, but after double-spacing, I ended up with seven. So I had to slash & burn my way through it while still maintaining its cohesion. Not an easy task - I did not pick an easy book with The Electric Acid Kool-Aid Test. Even after reading it twice, I got no historical significance from it. None of it had any impact on modern times, except maybe for inspiring multi-media events like raves & pimp & ho balls or something. Setting the Grateful Dead & the Deadhead multitudes loose on an unsuspecting public... But what's done is done, I guess. 

And now, another survey. With commentary about missing numbers.
    

************YOU, YOU, YOU***************

1. Nicknames: Perze, Jane, Kiyotesong, Kiy, the Mistress of Darkness
2. B-day: December 31
3. Age: 32
4. Sex: Yes please.
5. Social Security: Neither social nor secure

6. Where do you live: Las Vegas
7. What school do you attend?: Currently, CCSN
8. Siblings and their ages? A hypothetical half brother who’d be about 52, two half sisters, one 46, the other 44

9. Pets?: Two ball pythons & a dead coyote on a stick
10. Zodiac Sign: Capricorn
11. Righty or Lefty: Although I write with my right hand, I shoot with my left.

*********YOUR LOOKS*********

12. Hair color: Currently black with grey roots
13. Eye color: Hazel
14. Height 5’3 ¼”  
15. Do you wear contacts or glasses? Yes
16. Do you have any piercings? Yes
17. Where do you want more?: Hmmm. My septum, my lip, maybe a few more in my ears. Unfortunately, I work for Corporate America & they are not fond of facial mutilation
18. Do you have a tattoo?: Several

(No question 19?)
20. Do you wear any rings?: Yes

21. Do you have a certain fashion you follow?: Nope. It’s either uniform or night gown

(What about 22 or 23?)

24. What trousers are you wearing right now?: Trousers? Who in the fuck says trousers? No, I’m not wearing any pants if that’s what you really want to know.

25. What shirt are you wearing right now?: Since I’m not in my uniform, I’m in my night gown.

26. What underwear are you wearing right now?: None.
27. What does your hair look like at the moment?: Pure crap.
28. What song are u listening to right now?: The dishwasher & Rob playing WoW in the background
29. What was the last thing you ate? A caramel-filled milk chocolate bar
30. How is the weather right now?: I’ve been inside all day, so I’ve got no freakin’ clue
31. Last person you talked to on the phone: Rob

32. Last dream you can remember? That one where I was different women with slit throats

33. Who are you talking to right now?: No one.
34. What time is it?: 2:57am

(What’s up with question 35?)

************More about YOU!*****************

36.If you were a crayon, what color would you want to be? Wow. I wasn’t expecting a question of this level of complexity… I think I would want to be the color that gets used the most, so my wrapper would be all worn thin & I’d be worn down to a nub, the one you have to shake the entire box out onto the table to find.
37. Have you ever almost died? Yes.
38. Do you like the person that you got this from? Yes.

(What, don’t you like # 39?)
40. What makes you happy? Nothing makes me happy.

(Hmmm… there’s a huge gap here… like 41 through 44)

45. What are your future goals?: To pass yet another pre-requisite math class so I can finally get Algebra 101 done & over with

46. Do you like to dance? Yes.

(No #47 either)
48. What's the stupidest thing you ever done?: Blew my trust fund
49. What's your favorite memory? The time the dolphins stole my hat (I’m starting to thing I’ve already taken this survey…)

50. If you could change 1 thing about yourself what would it be? My skin.
51. Where do you shop the most?: Smith’s or Wal-Greens.
52. How many kids do you want to have? 0!.

(53? 53? Is 53 out sick or something? Did they take 54 with them?)
55. Do you do drugs? Yes, every day. They’re called ACE inhibitors, beta blockers, calcium channel blockers, aspirin, tricyclic antidepressant & birth control!

(What happened to questions 56 & 57? Did someone lose count?)

58. What sport do you hate the most? Polo or Tennis.

(59 must have ditched with 53 & 54)
60. How many TV's do you have in your house? 4, and I rarely watch any of them.

61. Do you have your own? Have my own what?

(Maybe it would have been explained in 62)
63. Do you sleep with stuffed animals? Yes.
64. Ever broken/sprained/fractured a bone? Yes. Often, and many more than once.
65. Who do you dream about? Depends on the dream.
66. Who do you tell your dreams to? Anyone who’ll listen or read
67. How many best friends do you have? 3

(Hey, 68 is only a lick away from 69…)

69. Is cheerleading a sport? No. It’s something to watch when you’re not watching the game

*********YOU and LOVE*********
(I’d love to see what 70 & 71 were supposed to be)
72. Do you believe in Love? Yes.
73. Do you have a girlfriend or boyfriend?: A husband.
74. Do you have a crush?: Yeah, there’s this guy at work that I’m sort of stalking.
(No 75 or 76. Those must have been too personal)

77. Do you believe in love at first sight?: Nope

78. Where would you like to go on your honeymoon?: This question is kind of obsolete for me. I would have liked to have gone away for my honeymoon. Instead, I went to work.

79… Nope, not here

80. What's the first thing you notice about the opposite sex?: Their back & shoulders

81. Longest crush? Michael J. Fox
82. Who do you want to spend the rest of your life with? Me, myself and I

(83, 84… gone where all the other numbers went)
85. Do others find you attractive? Do other what find me attractive?

*****ON GIRLS FOR GUYS FOR GUYS TO FILL OUT(for guys only)*****

I’m bi, it should count

(I guess questions 86 – 107 were all about the g-spot – no one knows where that is, either.)
108. Painted nails or not: I love a French manicure.
109. Regular or sports bra :  No bra!

(110? Musta been something about weight)
111. Cute n' mysterious or wild n' sexy: Wild & sexy & mysterious

(112? Body odor, maybe?)
113. Dark or blonde hair: Dark
114. Long or short hair: Hmmm… I’ve got no real opinion on this. I like it both ways
115. Curly or straight hair: Same as for 114
116. Dark, light, or crazy cool eyes: Green
117. Long or short nails: Long, rowr!
118. Hat or no hat: What’s that got to do with the price of rice in China?
119. Good or bad girl: Bad, very bad
120. Hair up or down: Down
121. Jewelry or none: Who really cares? Just don’t give me a concussion
122. Tall or short: Taller than me

(123? I’m gonna have to renumber this whole thing myself)
124. Accent or no accent: Speak English, please
125. Trousers or dress: What is it with the trousers again? Dress, show me some leg, baby!
126. Tan or fair: Fair
127. Glasses or none: Once again, who cares?
128. Pretty indoor chick or crazy party chick: A little from column A, a little from column B
129. Freckles or none: Freckles

(130 – under construction)
131. Funny or always cool: How about both?
132. Talkative or shy: I don’t need you to say a word, sugar…

*****Pick One: THIS OR THAT***********

133. Lights on/off: Off.
134. Sun or rain?: Rain.
135. Mickey D's (McDonalds) or BK (Burger King)?: Eww, gross. McDonald’s gets their fish from Gorton’s, & a Japanese fishing conglomerate that still kills whales owns Gorton’s. Boycott McDonald’s!!! I hate the taste of Burger King – and his commercials are very creepy.
136. Do you like scary or happy movies better?: Scary
137. Backstreet Boys or NSYNC: Oh dear Gods… neither!
138. On the phone or in person?: In person so I can smack you with my stapler
139. Paper or plastic?: Plastic.

(What, no 140 either?)
141. Summer or winter?: Summer.
142. Hugs or kisses? Just don’t touch me, okay?
143. Milk, Dark or White Chocolate? If I have to have chocolate, it might as well be healthy – give me dark

(Well, Gods be damned, you couldn’t be bothered with 144 through 177?)

 

******HAVE YOU EVER********

178. Loved someone so much it made you cry? Yes.
179. Drank? Yes.
180. Got drunk?: Yes.

(I guess since you skipped all those other numbers, 181 & 182 didn’t matter much either)
183. Ran from the cops?: Yes.

(Same went for 184 I see)
185. Stole something? Yes.

(And 186)
187. Made yourself throw up? No, I’ve never had to make myself, it just comes naturally. Maybe I can get on Jackass…

(Or 188 – dude, that was like, every other number!)
189. Made yourself cry to get out of trouble? No.

I Like This

I went looking for a poem... got this instead. It's okay, though, because I like it anyway.

Those who give you a serpent when you
ask for a fish, may have nothing but
serpents to give. It is then generosity
on their part.

-excerpt from Sand and Foam, by Kahlil Gibran

I got it from here:

http://www.math.miami.edu/~jason/gibran/gibran/sand_and_foam.html