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Vanity Fair Meme
Jun. 9th, 2007 08:38 am
I stole these from the June 2007 issue of Vanity Fair magazine! (No, I don’t normally read Vanity Fair, but there’s been one in the drawer of the night audit desk at work for like, a month, & the questions were being asked of David Steinberg. I don’t know who David Steinberg is (according to VF, he’s co-hosted the Tonight Show & directed episodes of Seinfeld & Curb Your Enthusiasm), but I like how he answered #19: Frank Sinatra’s dick, the early years.
So I did what you do w/memes. I deleted Steinberg's answers & inserted my own. If you wish to steal my Vanity Fair meme, do the same - delete my answers, insert your own :)
1. What is your idea of perfect happiness?
Reading Tarot on the beach for 'love offerings' and drawing tattoo flash & recycling cans for booze-money.
2. What is your greatest fear?
Waking up in a hospital after a major accident & finding 'medical' maggots debriding my necrotizing wound.
3. With what historical figure do you most identify?
Aleister Crowley
4. Which living person do you most admire?
This is a hard question, because there are so many of you out there. You deal with your own personal trauma & pain every day, you keep fighting, striving and creating, you inspire and garner respect with everything you do. And yet, you still find time to read my blog - I who am a middle-aged slacker who has done absolutely nothing with her life.
5. What trait do you most deplore in yourself?
That I am a middle-aged slacker who can't make money or time.
6. What trait do you most deplore in others?
The ones who have the inability or refusal to see patterns of self-destructive or self-limiting behavior in their own lives.
7. What is your greatest extravagance?
Bagels & lox from Einstein's a coupla times a week :P Lox are soooo good, though.
8. What is your favorite journey?
Night flights from anywhere to Las Vegas - the only time this city looks too beautiful to be real is from the air when it lights up the desert like a great golden coin. I also enjoyed taking the train from Portland, OR to Los Angeles, CA. It was a coastal route - saw big whales off the in the distance, we had to stop for a herd of elk. The rocking & swaying of the train felt natural & rocked me to sleep every night for a week.
9. Which virtue do you consider most overrated?
Chastity
10. On what occasion do you lie?
Well, aside from that whole pretending to orgasm stronger than I actually did... it's probably the "I love you" thing.
11. What do you dislike most about your appearance?
My skin.
12. Which living person do you most despise?
Oh, yeah, Mother Teresa is dead, ain't she? So is Jerry Falwell. Guess George W. Bush moved up to #1.
13. Which word or phrase do you most overuse?
"Night audit, this is Janelle, can I help you?"
14. What is your greatest regret?
Never saying "I love you" to one of the three people I honestly meant it.
15. What or who is the greatest love of your life?
There are three of them. At least two know who they are.
16. When and where were you happiest?
When I was reading Tarot cards & selling tattoo flash & collecting cans on Venice Beach.
17. If you could change one thing about yourself, what would it be?
My skin, again.
18. What do you consider your greatest achievement?
Actually making it through 5 semesters of school.
19. If you could choose what to come back as, what or who would it be?
I've always wanted to come back as a dolphin. Otters know how to have fun, too, though, so it's a toss-up.
20. What is your most treasured possession?
My memories - not of the past in this life, or my childhood memories, but the ones I've held onto deep inside.
21. What do you regard as the lowest depth of misery?
Having your husband crying in bed next to you because he doesn't want to go get a job & you asked him to do so last week. I hate when grown men cry.
22. Where would you most like to live?
Carmel-by-the-Sea
23. What is your favorite occupation?
Now, I don't do this for a living, but there is a factory in Sweden that makes glass & silicon dildoes. I would love to work as a dildo fabricator or better yet, dildo tester.
24. What is your most marked characteristic?
Honestly, it's my lazy eye. It wanders around a lot, so people never fail to notice that I'm only looking at them straight on with one eye & the other one is star-gazing... or looking at their shoes, or over their right shoulder or just completely slipped down under my eyelid. I make people nervous because they think someone or something is creeping up behind them.
25. What is the quality you like most in a man?
Girlish hips
26. What is the quality you like most in a woman?
Husky voice
27. What do you value most in your friends?
The ability to accept honesty from others.
28. Who are your favorite writers?
Clive Barker, Poppy Z. Brite, Elizabeth Hand, Stephen King, J. K. Rowling, Richard Adams, Wade Davis, Dale Pendell... this could take me all day.
29. Who is your favorite fictional hero?
Bigwig, from Watership Down. He was a reluctant hero, kind of like Samwise.
30. What is it that you most dislike?
Gross-out biological humor in the vein of Adam Sandler or Tom Green.
31. How would you most like to die?
Carbon monoxide poisoning
32. What is your motto?
Places to go, things to do, people to beat.
So I did what you do w/memes. I deleted Steinberg's answers & inserted my own. If you wish to steal my Vanity Fair meme, do the same - delete my answers, insert your own :)
1. What is your idea of perfect happiness?
Reading Tarot on the beach for 'love offerings' and drawing tattoo flash & recycling cans for booze-money.
2. What is your greatest fear?
Waking up in a hospital after a major accident & finding 'medical' maggots debriding my necrotizing wound.
3. With what historical figure do you most identify?
Aleister Crowley
4. Which living person do you most admire?
This is a hard question, because there are so many of you out there. You deal with your own personal trauma & pain every day, you keep fighting, striving and creating, you inspire and garner respect with everything you do. And yet, you still find time to read my blog - I who am a middle-aged slacker who has done absolutely nothing with her life.
5. What trait do you most deplore in yourself?
That I am a middle-aged slacker who can't make money or time.
6. What trait do you most deplore in others?
The ones who have the inability or refusal to see patterns of self-destructive or self-limiting behavior in their own lives.
7. What is your greatest extravagance?
Bagels & lox from Einstein's a coupla times a week :P Lox are soooo good, though.
8. What is your favorite journey?
Night flights from anywhere to Las Vegas - the only time this city looks too beautiful to be real is from the air when it lights up the desert like a great golden coin. I also enjoyed taking the train from Portland, OR to Los Angeles, CA. It was a coastal route - saw big whales off the in the distance, we had to stop for a herd of elk. The rocking & swaying of the train felt natural & rocked me to sleep every night for a week.
9. Which virtue do you consider most overrated?
Chastity
10. On what occasion do you lie?
Well, aside from that whole pretending to orgasm stronger than I actually did... it's probably the "I love you" thing.
11. What do you dislike most about your appearance?
My skin.
12. Which living person do you most despise?
Oh, yeah, Mother Teresa is dead, ain't she? So is Jerry Falwell. Guess George W. Bush moved up to #1.
13. Which word or phrase do you most overuse?
"Night audit, this is Janelle, can I help you?"
14. What is your greatest regret?
Never saying "I love you" to one of the three people I honestly meant it.
15. What or who is the greatest love of your life?
There are three of them. At least two know who they are.
16. When and where were you happiest?
When I was reading Tarot cards & selling tattoo flash & collecting cans on Venice Beach.
17. If you could change one thing about yourself, what would it be?
My skin, again.
18. What do you consider your greatest achievement?
Actually making it through 5 semesters of school.
19. If you could choose what to come back as, what or who would it be?
I've always wanted to come back as a dolphin. Otters know how to have fun, too, though, so it's a toss-up.
20. What is your most treasured possession?
My memories - not of the past in this life, or my childhood memories, but the ones I've held onto deep inside.
21. What do you regard as the lowest depth of misery?
Having your husband crying in bed next to you because he doesn't want to go get a job & you asked him to do so last week. I hate when grown men cry.
22. Where would you most like to live?
Carmel-by-the-Sea
23. What is your favorite occupation?
Now, I don't do this for a living, but there is a factory in Sweden that makes glass & silicon dildoes. I would love to work as a dildo fabricator or better yet, dildo tester.
24. What is your most marked characteristic?
Honestly, it's my lazy eye. It wanders around a lot, so people never fail to notice that I'm only looking at them straight on with one eye & the other one is star-gazing... or looking at their shoes, or over their right shoulder or just completely slipped down under my eyelid. I make people nervous because they think someone or something is creeping up behind them.
25. What is the quality you like most in a man?
Girlish hips
26. What is the quality you like most in a woman?
Husky voice
27. What do you value most in your friends?
The ability to accept honesty from others.
28. Who are your favorite writers?
Clive Barker, Poppy Z. Brite, Elizabeth Hand, Stephen King, J. K. Rowling, Richard Adams, Wade Davis, Dale Pendell... this could take me all day.
29. Who is your favorite fictional hero?
Bigwig, from Watership Down. He was a reluctant hero, kind of like Samwise.
30. What is it that you most dislike?
Gross-out biological humor in the vein of Adam Sandler or Tom Green.
31. How would you most like to die?
Carbon monoxide poisoning
32. What is your motto?
Places to go, things to do, people to beat.
