Namaste, Bitches

It's a well-known fact that I hate my job. And my working environment is getting worse, day by day. I want out so bad... but I can't quit because Rob won't work and I don't have another job to go to. So tonight I told Rob I think a lot of my stress would be alleviated if I stepped down from night audit & went back to being a regular ol' desk clerk with no responsibilities. Immediately, he started arguing with me about how he thinks it would be a bad idea & first he said he didn't want to hear me bitch if I did step down, but I imagine after he saw my expression (it felt weird on my face, I have no idea what I actually looked like) he changed it to 'well, you can bitch but I won't offer any sympathy'.

So now I'm sitting here & the strongest urge to go get a shot of tequila washed over me. It's still a strong urge. I'd really, really like to get drunk, starting right about now. This is how I know that even after all these years of moderation and binging that is so infrequent it's more like occasional stupidity than binging that I am still an alcoholic.

I did, however, go to the gym earlier. I'm still having a helluva time with extending my right leg.

I woke up this evening & was sitting here checking my e-mail & out of habit, I started playing with my hair. My fingers got stuck in a big nasty knot. I realized, much to my utter dismay and grossed-out horror that I had a wad of blue minty gum stuck to my scalp right behind my ear. Now, I showered at the gym last night when I got out of the pool & I'm wondering why I didn't feel it in there. So I had to give myself a veggie oil treatment to loosen that crap up. At least it all came out during my pre-work shower.

I'm going to have to start checking the seats on the work-out equipment very carefully. That's just fucking nasty. Who does that, anyway? Just sticks their gum wherever, doesn't bother to throw it away? I thought people stopped doing that in grade school. Ugh. Women can be just as piggy as men, I swear.

Yay me! Worked out for an hour, swam for about 15 min. - I did three laps & thought I was gonna die, spent another 15 in the jacuzzi.

Tomorrow I'm going to try for the Mind/Body class, which according to the expanded schedule, is a combination of Tai Chi, Qi Gong & Pilates. The bellydancing class is right after the Mind/Body one - let's see if I have the guts :)

I am sooooo lazy today. I got my gym membership t'other day, still haven't used it. I kept thinking, "Ok, this morning I go swimming!"... here it is five days later & the only smelly chlorinated water I've been exposed to is my shower. Today I had grandiose gym plans, but by the time I left work my knees were screaming & when I got up, it feels like I'm sludging through mud. I spent an hour out on the desk yesterday morning, which I've really got to stop volunteering for because it's very hard on my knees. Tomorrow morning, we're doing the Father's day buffet thing w/the in-laws (**sarcasm font** yippee), so I know tomorrow is going to be spent doing a lot of digesting.

Oh well... I signed up for a 2-year contract, so if I don't launch straight into it, I've got plenty of time to find a roundtuit.

Got to start shopping for a gym. I'm probably just going to use the one at my physical therapist's. Mainly because the clientele is small & mostly it's people getting physical therapy - no one is there to put on a fashion show. The only drawback is the cost for personal trainer sessions. It's kind of cost-prohibitive, but I have no idea how or where to start. I am not a work-out maven by any stretch of the concept.

Why am I finding dog hairs on my chair?

Last night the ghost was really active - kept pushing the back of my chair. When Rob got up around 10, I made him a piece of apple pie, & I could have sworn that I saw small feet in a footsie-type pajama bottom standing in the kitchen doorway. It freaked me out because I almost asked the little boy if he wanted a piece of pie before I realized that he didn't belong there.