Ah Yes, the Freak Show of My Life

... and this guy from Seether is the ring-master running amok in my head.

Your result for The Which DOORS song are you? Test...

STRANGE DAYS

"Strange days have found us ... and through their strange hours, we linger alone"

_{You scored highest in Exile, so your Doors song is Strange Days. It is the dark and brooding masterpiece that starts off the album of the same name, which is undoubtedly the most grim and pessimistic album the Doors ever recorded. Like almost everything else on the album, this song is about alientation and being out of touch with the world, but it is not so much about being different from other people as it is about being different from the world itself, being one of the countless people overwhelmed by the changing times and the general confusion and madness of modern existence ... which if anything has only gotten worse since 1967. The song sets the theme for the entire album, with its cover picture of circus freaks and bizzarre performers. Strange Days is the most direct statement The Doors ever made about how people can feel like a stranger in their own homeland ... how the longer we live in this world, the less we seem to understand it ... how in the end, nobody really knows what the fuck is going on. And how we are dragged day by day into an even stranger future.}

_{Strange days have found us. If you don't believe me, take a look around ...}

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_{MY SCORING SYSTEM ... OR A BRIEF EXPLANATION OF WHY ANY OF THIS SHOULD MAKE ANY SENSE WHATSOEVER}

_{I based this test around four of the crucial elements underlying much of The Doors' music, and also what I perceive to be four distinct facets of Jim Morrison's personality. It's not a perfect system but I think there's a certain logic to it that we can apply here (if you have a better way of doing it, be my guest). These four variables are as follows ...}

_{>>> The Shaman is a spiritual guru, the American Indian's "medicine man" who enters into a trance-like state and enacts a ritual to bring his audience to enlightenment. This is an essential quality of songs like "Break On Through To The Other Side" or any Doors song where mystic knowledge is sought after.}

_{>>> The Reveller is a hedonist that alters his consciousness through physical ecstasy -- sex, alcohol, drugs, and so on -- seeking the Palace of Wisdom through the Road of Excess. This is an essential quality of songs like "Light My Fire" or any Doors song about passion and youthful exhuberance.}

_{>>> The Exile is an outcast that has been alienated by his fellow man, an outsider condemned to a lonely and misunderstood existence. This is an essential quality of songs like "People Are Strange" or any Doors song dealing with alienation and rejection.}

_{>>> The Nihilist is an existential cynic that sees Death as the only real Truth. He or she lives life for the moment and objects to laws, tradition, religion, or any other form of social control ... life is too short to worry about other people's rules. The Nihilist is the proverbial Rebel Without A Cause. This is an essential quality of songs like "When The Music's Over" or any Doors song based on discontent and fatalism.}

_{Most Doors songs contain varying degrees of these four principles, although some songs are very strongly inclined towards one of the four. I didn't include every Doors song ever made in this test, but I did try to include most of their best songs, at least insofar as I could fit them into the framework of my crude scoring system. It's far from perfect, but I think it works in a weird sort of way. Hopefully Morrison isn't rolling over in his grave right now. I mean assuming he's actually in there to begin with.}

_{THE END is the exception to the four variables ... you cannot get this song by scoring high or low in any of these variables. You can only score THE END if you look beyond the four variables and see the true essence of The Doors. There's more to The Doors than "the image" of The Doors ... it's not just about a sex symbol in leather pants tripping on acid and saying the word "fuck" over and over. Forget the hype, just listen to the music. It's some of the most unique and innovative and mind-opening music you will ever experience.}

Take The Which DOORS song are you? Test at HelloQuizzy

What's funny is that this test is actually fairly accurate. Strange Days is probably my favorite Doors album... it has all those dark carnival elements.

Writer's Block: Thanks for the Input

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It's funny, I'm rarely, if ever, the receiver of advice. I rarely, if ever, ask for advice. People come to me for advice, which to me is nearing insane because my life is not a good example of success or good decisions.

I think what's more telling is the advice I never received, even when I did ask for it. I always had my parents, sisters, friends, guidance counselors, therapists, etc. telling me, "Oh, you're so smart! Whatever you decide to do, you'll succeed! You can be anything you want, do anything you want to do!"

No one ever tried to stop me when I decided to drop out of high school, not even those guidance counselors or principals or teachers who thought I was so brilliant, such a shining star... no one. Everyone just said to me, "Well, if it's what you want to do, go ahead & drop out." I received a hefty trust fund when I hit 18 - not one of my relatives told me to invest that money in my future. Instead, they were all standing there with their hands out.

Twenty years later, I'm a middle-aged slacker who still doesn't know what I want to be when I grow up. I job-hop incessantly. It's taken me five years to get a three-year associates degree - and I'm still not quite done with it. I feel this constant nagging sense of misdirection and dissatisfaction with everything I do.

I know teenagers are probably the most difficult thing on the planet to try & communicate with. You can probably have greater success having deep intellectual discussions with rocks or mealworms, especially when they counter every single thing with, "You can't tell me what to do!" but damn... telling me I could be the first woman president of the United States (and hey, I still have a shot at it - too bad I hate politicians) wasn't taking my interests or aptitudes into account, and it definitely wasn't giving me any direction or guidance.

New Car Smell

I was at the gynecologist's this morning, await my biopsy. On a tray next to the table was a bottle of what looked like canned air or maybe WD40. Had the red straw sticking out of it. I picked it up & saw it was HurriCaine, a topical anaesthetic.

Nothing too shocking there, right. I kept reading.

'Original Wild Cherry Flavor'.

Yeah, I fucking died. The doctor & his assistant came in & all I could do was gasp, "Original Wild Cherry!" while pointing at the can. The doctor picks it up, reads it & then says, "Why would it need to be wild cherry flavored if we're spraying it into your vagina?" (My gynecologist is from Africa, & has this great British accent, so he sounded so deadpan & puzzled...)

I couldn't help myself, so I tell him, "Could be worse, could be New Car Smell!"

In case anyone hasn't figured it out, it's a topical benzocaine used in dental offices. It took the doctor a couple of minutes to read the rest of the can. He's like, "Ohhh, this is dental anaesthetic!"



Then as I'm laying there w/my feet up in the stirrups, right before he spritzes me w/the stuff, he asks, innocently, "Does your husband like cherry flavor?"

OMFG!!! I was in tears. So now all day, all I can think about is Original Wild Cherry.