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What Died in Here?
Aug. 29th, 2011 04:06 pm
In my quest for some decent sandalwood oil, I stumbled upon something called Black Phoenix Alchemy Lab.
My house, my purse and I are all very stinky right now. I don't know if it was wise for me to open all 8 of the little teeny bottles of perfume oils in rapid succession of one another. It smells kind of like a bleeding dragon collided with a polecat doused in cinnamon & bathed with Irish Spring soap. And cheesy dog farts, but that didn't come out of a little sample bottle, that came from Chelsie's butt.
Here are my initial impressions:
Port-Au-Prince is heady with cloves, maybe vetiver. Kubla Khan is weirdly spicy & musky, and tantalizing.
Bohun Upas smells like a man. I really wanted to like Bohun Upas because it is a poison tree, possibly the other tree from the Garden of Eden, the one the Bible never talked much about... but nope, smells like a man's leathery sort of cologne. Not bad, but too many people automatically assume I'm a bull dyke as it is.
Malice, Bloodlust, Serpent's Kiss & Fenris Wolf all smell alike to me - all like dragon's blood. Which, don't get me wrong, I lurv me some dragon's blood, but I can't differentiate between any of them beyond 'omfg dragon's blood!!!!!111!!!1!'
Cthulhu smells like Irish Spring and something minty. Not exactly watery or oceany, or anything like what I'd imagine the Horror From Beyond the Stars to smell like. Just Irish Spring & mint. It will probably become an offering to a not-so-Elder God. Hades likes mint.
What's truly amusing is that none of the oils I picked out for my sampler involved sandalwood in any major way. Kubla, Bohun or Port-Au-Prince might have some understory sandalwood. I was hoping for some Black Lace because I wanted to see what, exactly, castoreum smells like. Alas, no Black Lace available in sample size (which are apparently called 'imps'). Their customer service person contacted me & asked if I had a replacement in mind - I just basically told them I was looking for something similar to Black Lace w/bay rum or tobacco flower, and I'm thinking Port-Au-Prince might be the substitute on that. According to the site, P-a-P has sassafras (clove-ish spiciness) and bay rum, so there ya go.
I'm probably going to have to investigate these a little more once the ripe melange of eye-watering funk subsides, which probably means until after I take another shower. I've since added some kind of orangey dish soap to it. Yum.
Went to the cardiologist today, my stress test came back normal. Blood pressure is good, too. So now I'm going to go make myself some chorizo & eggs. Rob's got a colonoscopy tomorrow, so he's on a clear-liquid & Jell-o fast, which means I'm trying to avoid things he likes. I've got chorizo for lunch & an eggplant lurking in the fridge for later. Fried eggplant is teh bomb. I wish the stores here would carry green tomatoes - fried green tomatoes are even bomber.
My house, my purse and I are all very stinky right now. I don't know if it was wise for me to open all 8 of the little teeny bottles of perfume oils in rapid succession of one another. It smells kind of like a bleeding dragon collided with a polecat doused in cinnamon & bathed with Irish Spring soap. And cheesy dog farts, but that didn't come out of a little sample bottle, that came from Chelsie's butt.
Here are my initial impressions:
Port-Au-Prince is heady with cloves, maybe vetiver. Kubla Khan is weirdly spicy & musky, and tantalizing.
Bohun Upas smells like a man. I really wanted to like Bohun Upas because it is a poison tree, possibly the other tree from the Garden of Eden, the one the Bible never talked much about... but nope, smells like a man's leathery sort of cologne. Not bad, but too many people automatically assume I'm a bull dyke as it is.
Malice, Bloodlust, Serpent's Kiss & Fenris Wolf all smell alike to me - all like dragon's blood. Which, don't get me wrong, I lurv me some dragon's blood, but I can't differentiate between any of them beyond 'omfg dragon's blood!!!!!111!!!1!'
Cthulhu smells like Irish Spring and something minty. Not exactly watery or oceany, or anything like what I'd imagine the Horror From Beyond the Stars to smell like. Just Irish Spring & mint. It will probably become an offering to a not-so-Elder God. Hades likes mint.
What's truly amusing is that none of the oils I picked out for my sampler involved sandalwood in any major way. Kubla, Bohun or Port-Au-Prince might have some understory sandalwood. I was hoping for some Black Lace because I wanted to see what, exactly, castoreum smells like. Alas, no Black Lace available in sample size (which are apparently called 'imps'). Their customer service person contacted me & asked if I had a replacement in mind - I just basically told them I was looking for something similar to Black Lace w/bay rum or tobacco flower, and I'm thinking Port-Au-Prince might be the substitute on that. According to the site, P-a-P has sassafras (clove-ish spiciness) and bay rum, so there ya go.
I'm probably going to have to investigate these a little more once the ripe melange of eye-watering funk subsides, which probably means until after I take another shower. I've since added some kind of orangey dish soap to it. Yum.
Went to the cardiologist today, my stress test came back normal. Blood pressure is good, too. So now I'm going to go make myself some chorizo & eggs. Rob's got a colonoscopy tomorrow, so he's on a clear-liquid & Jell-o fast, which means I'm trying to avoid things he likes. I've got chorizo for lunch & an eggplant lurking in the fridge for later. Fried eggplant is teh bomb. I wish the stores here would carry green tomatoes - fried green tomatoes are even bomber.
