Getting Nervous & Jody Finally Wins
Sep. 2nd, 2009 10:03 pm![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
perzephone
Tom did more for Jody after his death than he ever could for her during his life. His life insurance and Culinary Union survivor benefits kicked in. Jody bought herself a house - granted, it's a double-wide trailer with 2 bedrooms & 2 bathrooms, but it's still 100% hers - no mortgage, no lease-to-own, no roommates. Her lot rent will also be affordable on Tom's pension. She moved in over the past weekend. I am so happy for her :D She finally got a break. Makes me feel good about the Universe, yanno?
Tuesday afternoon I get to go have my kidney stone removed. Yay. I'm getting a little apprehensive. I've never had an invasive body-cavity surgery. I still have my appendix and my tonsils. Even when I got hit by the car, they didn't have to cut me open beyond putting steel pins in my leg. I had corrective eye surgery when I was 8 or 9. Had teef pulled. Had microfracture surgery in my knee, done laparascopically. I asked someone at the hospital if they were going to have to trepannate me the night I almost had a stroke. (I also said they could take away my zebra over my dead body, so take the trepanning as you will).
The process of removing this kidney stone is going to be highly invasive and will most likely induce trauma to my tender insides. It's at the bottom of my kidney. Now, I'm not a complete and total freak, which for me means the mere thought of urinary sounding makes my eyes water and I cross my legs & squeeze them together while clamping my hands over my pubic region - I wonder about the sanity of people who want to stretch their urethras to incontinent proportions even more than I'd wonder about someone who volunteers for trepanning. So the thought of the doctor sticking a laser into my urethra, threading it up through my bladder, into my kidney and then using my kidney's interior to bend the laser into position for blasting away the enormous rock... and following the laser with a flexible basket at the end of a metal tube... I'm already getting a burning sensation when I pee. Sometimes it's hard to pee... Not because I've got an infection or anything, but because I'm just tense about the whole thing.
The doctor could poke a hole in me anywhere along the route - urethra, bladder, ureter or my kidney. The laser could miss and traumatize unsuspecting tissue. They could tear my kidney with the little basket thingy. There's a risk of infection. Bleeding. Or, the worst case scenario - they might have to make multiple trips.
So I'm nervous. Back in August, when I was still seeing doctors and getting x-rays and tests, it all seemed very far away. Tonight we were grocery shopping, and normally I plan my lunches for 2 weeks. As I was stuffing a bag full of apples, I realized, "Hey, wait a minute. I don't need 10 apples. I'm working Thursday, Friday we're having a potluck & I'm home all next week." It hit me again while I was looking at pineapple cups and cottage cheese. I was wishing they made single-serve cottage cheese, like yogurt, because I only really was going to have it for lunch tomorrow. Even yesterday while touring Rainbow (all my doctors, the x-ray lab & the hospital are on Rainbow, spread from this end of town to Hacienda), and pre-registering, it wasn't as imminent as it was tonight.
Rob's doctor compounded my problems by calling & telling him his triglycerides were at 500. So now he's in his diabetic panic-mode. Which means my next week at home is going to be spent catering to his stupid ass while trying to 'take it easy' after my surgery.
Tuesday afternoon I get to go have my kidney stone removed. Yay. I'm getting a little apprehensive. I've never had an invasive body-cavity surgery. I still have my appendix and my tonsils. Even when I got hit by the car, they didn't have to cut me open beyond putting steel pins in my leg. I had corrective eye surgery when I was 8 or 9. Had teef pulled. Had microfracture surgery in my knee, done laparascopically. I asked someone at the hospital if they were going to have to trepannate me the night I almost had a stroke. (I also said they could take away my zebra over my dead body, so take the trepanning as you will).
The process of removing this kidney stone is going to be highly invasive and will most likely induce trauma to my tender insides. It's at the bottom of my kidney. Now, I'm not a complete and total freak, which for me means the mere thought of urinary sounding makes my eyes water and I cross my legs & squeeze them together while clamping my hands over my pubic region - I wonder about the sanity of people who want to stretch their urethras to incontinent proportions even more than I'd wonder about someone who volunteers for trepanning. So the thought of the doctor sticking a laser into my urethra, threading it up through my bladder, into my kidney and then using my kidney's interior to bend the laser into position for blasting away the enormous rock... and following the laser with a flexible basket at the end of a metal tube... I'm already getting a burning sensation when I pee. Sometimes it's hard to pee... Not because I've got an infection or anything, but because I'm just tense about the whole thing.
The doctor could poke a hole in me anywhere along the route - urethra, bladder, ureter or my kidney. The laser could miss and traumatize unsuspecting tissue. They could tear my kidney with the little basket thingy. There's a risk of infection. Bleeding. Or, the worst case scenario - they might have to make multiple trips.
So I'm nervous. Back in August, when I was still seeing doctors and getting x-rays and tests, it all seemed very far away. Tonight we were grocery shopping, and normally I plan my lunches for 2 weeks. As I was stuffing a bag full of apples, I realized, "Hey, wait a minute. I don't need 10 apples. I'm working Thursday, Friday we're having a potluck & I'm home all next week." It hit me again while I was looking at pineapple cups and cottage cheese. I was wishing they made single-serve cottage cheese, like yogurt, because I only really was going to have it for lunch tomorrow. Even yesterday while touring Rainbow (all my doctors, the x-ray lab & the hospital are on Rainbow, spread from this end of town to Hacienda), and pre-registering, it wasn't as imminent as it was tonight.
Rob's doctor compounded my problems by calling & telling him his triglycerides were at 500. So now he's in his diabetic panic-mode. Which means my next week at home is going to be spent catering to his stupid ass while trying to 'take it easy' after my surgery.
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Date: 2009-09-03 02:19 pm (UTC)You owe me a dinner for getting my tubes tied!! ;p~~~~
*hugs* I treasure you and youve got my support.
Aw, thanks :)
Date: 2009-09-05 04:20 am (UTC)