Namaste, Bitches

The scorpions are back. Fuck. Killed one on the back wall & tried to kill one on the porch ceiling last night, but it eluded me. Now whenever the dog goes out we have to provide her an armed escort. She chases the crickets, and scorpions look quite similar to crickets - especially in the dark. I can tell the difference in the way they move, of course, but to Chelsie it's just something else for her to chase. And she sticks that long nose of hers into every little crack & crevice of the walls out there, so the likelihood of her getting nailed in the face is pretty high. We've got children's Benadryl on hand, too.

Got my kidney stent out today. ( Behind a cut to protect the innocent )

It's cooled off noticeably, it's dark when I get up in the morning... Autumn is truly here.

Well, last night as I was laying on the couch watching... Iron Chef? Aqua Teen Hunger Force? I don't remember... anyway, I caught sight of a largish scorpion toodling across the ceiling. Rob grabbed the ladder & broom & dispatched it to a watery death via toilet. Needless to say, he was all freaked out about it all night.

Anyway, since poisons have no effect on the tank-like arthropods, and there is nothing that will act as a physical/biological barrier to them (they don't care, they just crawl right over the sticky glue traps & crap), I started thinking magically, probably because I'm currently reading Aleister Crowley's "Magick in Theory & Practise"...

I saw myself burying a live scorpion in a jar, an act that I abhor, but would probably be effective, simply because I abhor the notion & because I saw myself doing it so clearly. But in the same vein as Crowley & his Thelemites, I started thinking about how we're having a problem that the Egyptians no doubt dealt with at some point - yes, the scorpions were sacred to them, but they probably didn't want the little fuckers running amok in their households, either. So I started being a techno-Pagan today & looking for 'spells to ward off scorpions' (no luck), 'protection spells against scorpions' (still no luck)... 'scorpion deities' - well, Bes kept scorpions & other nasties out of households, and then there's Serquet/Selket - the healing Goddess who has a scorpion on her head, or is sometimes (and rarely) pictured as a scorpion w/a Hathor-like woman's head (ew). I found one painted pewter statue of Her at www.twistedfeather.com Of course, I don't have to wait til I get Her statue to offer Her goodies in exchange for protection, but it's something to add to the wish list.

Apparently, Her feast day is October 23
Egyptian Festival Dates

From what I've read, Serquet/Selket/Serqet also guarded the canopic jar containing the intestines & the embalmer's tent... was linked w/the scorching heat of Ra, was also involved w/pregnancy & breastfeeding, magick, etc. & so forth.
Lady Moondancers Selket Page

I quit tribe.net not too long ago. Just let myself drop off the boards... but I'm coming to realize just how much time I actually spent on tribe. Which is why I quit in the first place. Too much time spent online, arguing w/people & getting defensive and thoroughly attached to the outcome of arguments & flame wars. It's obscenely addictive.

I have almost absolutely nothing to do online. I check the bank accounts, check my half.com sales... and that's about it. Which is why I'm filling my lj w/quizzes, which are almost, but not quite, as addictive as tribe.

Found the first dead scorpion of the season on the porch this morning. At least it was dead. It was a fat one, too. The Ex is littered w/dead dung beetles. Well, I don't know if they're really dung beetles, but they sure look like dung beetles. Big, black, shiny beetles that wouldn't look out of place in an African desert rolling elephant dung into balls. Had to go to the castle today to pick up my vacation check & Rob watched one trundling back & forth across the rotunda lobby. He said it was like one of those wind-up cars that changes directions whenever it hits a wall. It would trundle up to someone's foot & change direction... hit the wall, change direction... hit someone's luggage, change direction. It entertained Rob for about a half hour while I was tcb.

It's Kelly's first solo run as relief auditor. My phone is gonna be ringing off the hook tonight.

Just have this weird urge to write about nothing in particular, & no one in particular that I owe a letter to at the moment. There will probably be one in the mail this afternoon from Doug or possibly Josh... maybe Will. I gave Will my cell# but no phone calls so far - it's actually kind of relieving. I hate having to tell people "Oh, uh, sorry, I can't go out for that beer after all." After the Prince concert fiasco, I am done making any commitments to a social life whatsoever. I am married to the Job & that's that.

Talking to Jeff in the early morning light, looking at the trash piled up behind Tower 1, smelling that 'old grease trap smell', talking about how much of a hole the Ex is. Yes, I understand that it's got a medieval theme & all, but does it have to smell like a midden heap as well? Jeff's complaining about how all the women on the front desk bitch & complain & want to go home (everyone except me... I am the silently long-suffering), & I told him that for us on graveyard, having to deal w/the same problem night after night, it gets so old. No clean rooms, oversold, tired angry people who've driven 8 hrs. from California expecting to be able to go to their rooms & go to bed - instead they get harried, harrassed desk clerks telling them, "Sorry, your room is still dirty. While you wait the additional 2 hours for it to be cleaned, how about a dinner comp to our illustrious coffee shop?" It gets old. If it wasn't for night audit, I would have quit a year ago. It's nice to have some kind of goal to work towards, though, and for the first time in a long time I am seeing concrete results.

Rob found a tiny scorpion in his room last night - he put it in a jar. Why he didn't just kill the thing I don't know, he'd rather let it suffocate to death on instant-coffee fumes I suppose. So we have a small, angry scorpion in a coffee jar waiting for garbage day. Even though they're deadly I still find them fascinating, but I love the pretty deadly things in life.

Looked at pictures of a mass burial in S. America on rotten.com. Thought to myself that, in death, these men looked like badly preserved gorillas. Finally got around to making that tortellini & roast chicken - I would have preferred the three-cheese tortellini, but Rob wanted to try the pepperoni. I have yet to find a decent jarred alfredo sauce - the Buotini stuff in a plastic tub was no different in that respect. Too artificial - it had a metallic bitterness underlying the bland savor. Processed, dehydrated garlic, ugh. I just don't have time to cook anything, really. Packaged tortellini, canned sauces, canned Parmesan cheese. I'd love to be able to do that much extra, not so much for Rob but for myself. The excess salt is killing me.

Someone on tribe asked 'how do you get Pagans together'? I think the answer comes down to 'you don't.' It isn't humanly possible. Free booze used to be a pat answer, but not so much anymore. We've all grown up, gotten jobs, had kids, moved, died... no one can get together anymore because the scheduling is beyond the power of any mere mortal to figure out.

I can tell I've been tainted by society. I read an article in the Sunday paper about people who are 'childfree', meaning childless-by-choice. (Apparently, 'childless' is supposed to be reserved for people who want kids but can't have them for whatever reason, & it's derogatory for someone who is actually 'childfree'). I was sort of irked at the article - it seems like people have to justify being childfree to society, suffer pressure & subtle discrimination from those who aren't childfree or childless. I myself work w/someone who insists on telling me, "Oh, you're still young. You'll change your mind. It's different when they're yours'. No matter what I tell her, she just knows I'm gonna be spitting out bratlings. It's just like having to justify being fat & not dieting, or being a smoker, or being GLBT. Only 6.6% of American women are voluntarily childfree, so that puts me in a definite minority (the article didn't have stats for American men) but I don't really feel the need to justify my desires - people ask, I tell: "I freakin' hate kids.". I just wish some people would let it drop. It's weird how people, especially women, have a hard time dealing w/explanations that run under 10 words or so. The same coworker who thinks I'm gonna be a breeder any day now can't accept things people tell her as one-sentence explanations. If someone comes up to the desk & wants to talk to a CPS worker, I ask, "Do you want to file a report for abuse or neglect?" They tell me yes, I call Hotline & that's the end of it. I don't need to hear the rest of the story. Kathy, on the other hand, wants to give people the fifth degree, & when I'm dealing w/someone, she gives me the fifth degree about why they came in. And she keeps grilling me, "Well, what kind of abuse, blah de blah de blah." A woman brought about 10 kids in that she wanted to abandon - I asked her, "Do you need to report abuse or neglect?" She said, "No, I want Child Haven to take them, I can't take care of them." 14 words, tells me everything I need to know - fine by me, I called Hotline. So Kathy wants to know the woman's life story. I finally snapped, "If you want to know her life story, go ask her yourself! I got all the info I needed from her!" The woman in question was huddled in a corner w/her hands over her head while her children systematically destroyed the front lobby & points beyond. (Bruce just walked by - I suspect he may be gay... he tells me he doesn't like straight lines as he systematically makes everything on the counter crooked, included the bear that sits on my monitor). Kathy drives me bonkers. Debbie at the night job is another one - ends every sentence with "You know what I mean?" It's like talking to a mobster.And Bill, the security guard here at the day job, likes to brag about how much money he used to make, & how much experience he has working w/Cisco Systems. So if he's got all this experience setting up these big fancy networks, making over $100 an hour, why is he a contracted security guard? I do know he's got a gambling problem. My coworker now, Joann, she's cool - she is an old mobster.

Me & Rob got into this discussion about the location of the soul. He thinks it's got something to do w/the brain, I vote for the solar plexus. I don't even think the soul resides in the body at all - I think it's just tethered to the body. But I also don't think the soul is responsible for conscious logical thought - I think that all takes place in the synapses of the brain. Automatic & autonomic thought processes. Brain farts. It's harder to think of the brain as the home of the soul when something like 80% of the adult brain is essentially dead tissue. Which is why when a person slips into a coma & stays there for lengths of time, the brain actually starts to rot... turns into slimy, green coma-brain goo. Rob's eventual goal is to become some sort of cybernetic robot w/a functioning consciousness - he's so dead-set on immortality that his fear of death keeps him from living. My fear of living keeps me wishing for a quick death :)

How do I know? I killed the first scorpion of Spring yesterday, of course. It was big enough for even me to see on the back wall... looking at that reddish splotch saying to myself, "That doesn't look like a cockroach..."
Been raining. Love it. People don't know how to drive out here, tho. They had the freeway shut down for something - whatever happened, it was fiery. Burnt one of the retaining walls completely black. Of course, because it's Saturday, I can't find a damned news program to watch.
Fed the snakes. Night audited. Worried about Josh, who actually fucking emailed me last night. Miracles of miracles. Probably wanted me to come over before I went to work, right, like that's gonna happen. I pretty much stay glued to the couch when I gotta go to work. I didn't even want to get up to go to work. I was so tired. I think I'm going back to Mattimoe on Monday to get more Ambien. Sleep, more than 4 hrs. a day, would be a nice change. Can't wind down in the mornings, feel like I'm buzzing around on crack or something most of the time... new blood pressure meds. Welcome to Applied Chemistry 101. I'll be your guinea pig...

So the Orkin Army came to our house this morning & waged chemical warfare. So far, the only casualties we've seen are crickets. It's very sad. One staggered out to Rob's feet, his antennae drooping, and died looking up at Rob as if to say, "What have we done to offend you so grievously?" I've also seen a total of maybe 3 dead roaches, which is surprising - I thought there'd be quite a few more of those, considering how many there were when we moved in. Maybe defoliating the area helped those numbers some.

"Poisonous Scorpions in Nevada", by Jeff B. Knight, Entomologist, State of NV. Dept. of Business & Industry, Div. of Agriculture

(Sarcastic commentary by yours truly.)

Intro:
Approx. 23 species of scorpions are found in Nevada. Often more than one species will live in close proximity to others. In fact, 8 species were found at one location in northern NV. Of all the species in NV., only one is considered to be seriously poisonous, a bark scorpion - Centruroides exilicauda. All the other species have venom and can sting when provoked or trapped, but the reaction to the sting is usually mild.

(Of all the 23 species in Nevada, which one do we have? You guessed it - the Bark scorpion. Woohoo. The irony strikes me strongly here - I hate the house, my mother-in-law owns it, and she is a Scorpio... Of course, I also have an affinity for poisonous things, so we also have black widows in our back yard, but they've stayed where they belong - the back yard.)

Distribution:
In N. America, bark scorpions occur from Arizona to Florida. C. exilicauda occurs primarily in Arizona, but ranges into New Mexico, Nevada, Mexico & has been transported into several other states. In drier climates, they tend to prefer riparian areas. Bark scorpions occur naturally in a small area in southern Nevada bounded by the Virgin River, Lake Mead & the Arizona border. These scorpions were first found in this area in 1984. Not until 1993 was the scorpion found outside of this area, even though exhaustive surveys were conducted in southern Nevada. At least 6 separate locations in Las Vegas have submitted this scorpion for identification in 1993.

(Well, make me number whatever for 2003. We took our dead-scorpion-in-a-jar to Shirlene at the Dept. of Agriculture today, & she said, "Yup, that's a bark scorpion. See the thin tail & delicate pincers?" Said something else about angled incisions on the pincers & some organ under their head only really visible under a microscope. It's being sent to Reno for scientific identification & logging into their databases.)

The rapid increase & spread of this scorpion could have only come from multiple introductions. The most likely sources of introduction being nursery stock (especially palm trees) and possibly building materials.

(What have I been saying about the Gods-be-damned palm trees all along?!!! Hey, my m.i.l. has a coupla palm trees in her front yard...)

Description:
Mature bark scorpions average between 2 - 3" in length, including the tail. Their color ranges from a light yellow to a reddish tan. They are very delicate looking, w/long, slender tails & thin claws, compared to other scorpions. The tail is often as long or longer than the body. The sting, which is used for defense & killing prey, is located at the end of the tail.

(Yup. Pretty, delicate, lacy looking scorpions. Something so fine & artful hides an interesting secret. Even their small little faces, which look so curious & monkey-like for being a bug, don't let you in on their private joke. Foxy, sly little creatures. A scorpion's sting, btw, is known as a "telsor".)

Life Cycle: Bark scorpions give birth to their young from about May - Oct. A litter of young averages about 20 individuals. The female scorpion will carry her young on her back until their first molt (7 - 12 days). The average life span of a bark scorpion is about 5 years. The scorpions may take from 6 mos. to 1 year to mature & begin reproducing.

(5 years - long-lived for an invertebrate. Average female, having 1 litter a year... means she can have about 80 - 120 young in her life. Falsehood: the young are not more poisonous than the adults. They have the same poison, & inject it in smaller amounts, so they are actually less likely to cause harm than an adult scorpion. But they are more likely to sting in self-defense. Watching a scorpion's tail, it doesn't just arch over its head to sting - that sucker can sting in every direction - sideways, backwards, straight up, down... full circular motion. Scorpions are very good mothers, though. Like possums, carrying their young around. Talk about family baggage!)

Habits: Most literature reports that these scorpions tend to like riparian habitats. However, in Nevada, we find them in rock outcroppings as well as in trees, both near water & in what appear to be very dry areas. Bark scorpions, unlike most other species, tend to be more gregarious & may be found in large numbers together, especially during winter months. In Las Vegas, specimens have been caught from both inside homes (on walls & behind pictures) & outside. Outdoors, they have been collected from palm trees, outer walls of buildings & concrete block walls. Another peculiar habit of bark scorpions is their tendency to climb. They are often found fair distances off the ground. They may even spend most of their lives in trees seeking cover during the daylight under the bark & in cracks & crevices of the tree (this is especially true w/palm trees). Most of our other species of scorpions prefer to be ground dwellers.
All scorpions are nocturnal & come out at night to hunt for food or mate. However, it is important to realize that only a small portion of the population may be out on any one night.

(There are more of them.) (Gods-be-damned palm trees.)

Pest Status & Symptoms: Bark scorpions are the only species in NV that are considered seriously or deadly poisonous. If stung by this species, you may exhibit a variety of symptoms. Stings are usually immediately painful. The limb or area around the sting may exhibit numbness, weakness & even paralysis. Other symptoms that may show up are hyperactivity, anxiety, profuse salivation, dizziness, respiratory distress & even convulsions. The sting site does not swell & become discolored as it does w/other species of scorpions. If a person has been stung by a bark scorpion, a physician should be contacted. However, most treatments can be done at home w/the use of mild analgesics & cold compresses for discomfort. Children 2 years old & younger are especially susceptible & often require hospitalization. Antivenin does exist in Arizona, but should only be given when absolutely necessary. Deaths in recent years are very rare.

(Sorry, Lisa, honey, but you can’t come over any more. Deaths are rare – but not unknown. I don’t think I’ll be having much company at all, not even Jody. The toxin is a neurotoxin, similar to black widows, but stronger, more potent. And scorpions, like wasps, don’t die when they sting, they just keep on stinging.)

Controls: The most effective method of control is finding the scorpions at night w/a blacklight. Scorpions fluoresce a yellow-green color when exposed to blacklight. Once detected they can be physically killed or sprayed w/a chemical. Spraying is most effective when the scorpion is directly sprayed. Spraying infested areas w/residual-type sprays may have some effect in controlling the species.

(We’ll probably be moving, yet again. Soon as we save up 1st/last & security deposits. Maybe we’ll go back to The Pointes, where Josh lives. Make him paranoid. The m.i.l. is laying plans to sell the house. Can’t say I’m especially sorry.)

In my bathroom. Well, ok, one scorpion in my bathroom last night. Don't know where it came in from, don't know when it came in, don't know how long it was traversing the terrains of my home. Alls I know is this: We walk around barefoot in this house. These are fairly large, desert-landscaping-colored, aggressive scorpions. Our entire house is earth-tone. How'n tha fuck we gonna see these rotten little invaders unless we actually step on or nearby one or brush one?
Spiders in the house are different. They know they don't belong. When you approach a spider on the wall, say, with murder in your eyes & a piece of toilet paper in your hand, the spider has the sense to hunch up & stand very, very still, making the smallest possible target of itself. If you get too close, they bolt for cover. Scorpions, on the other hand, are like New York cabbies. You get to close to one, they puff up & wave their pincers around as if to say, "Ay! I'm standing here! What, you talking to me? Are YOU talking to ME? Bring it on, meatbag!" Scorpions, for the most part, are very small bugs (arthropods for you etymology geeks out there) with very big balls.
As a potential gardner, I've got no problem w/the scorpion population as long as they stay outside. I don't know if this single scorpion was a wandering nomad, lost in the maze of urbania trying to get home, or if it was a scout, or, more likely, the same scorpion that came after me the other day on the porch. It's probably been looking for me, and now that its plans were foiled by the dustpan, it will be even more determined to seek my bare feet out & make my life miserable.