Actually, Capricorn is The Devil...

I am The Hermit The Hermit often suggests a need for time alone - a period of reflection when distractions are limited. In times of action and high energy, he stands for the still center that must be created for balance. He can also indicate that withdrawal or retreat is advised for the moment. In addition, the Hermit can represent seeking of all kinds, especially for deeper understanding or the truth of a situation. "Seek, and ye shall find," we have been told, and so the Hermit stands for guidance as well. We can receive help from wise teachers, and, in turn, help others as we progress. For a full description of your card and other goodies, please visit LearnTarot.com

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Perdition

I am so lost, and I keep telling Rob to leave me alone about shit, but he just kept hammering away last night... The move, what I want to do for the rest of my life, what would make me happy, where would I be happier... He came very close to making me cry last night. I hate crying. It is useless & fruitless & makes yer eyes & nose swell up.

I've already come to the conclusion that me ever becoming a mortician is a dead end. There's just no fucking way. But how do I refocus myself? I've got this horrible feeling that time is just running out for me. I need to decide what I'm going to do with the rest of my life... but I hate what I'm good at. I loathe it. And the idea of going to school to officialize that which I am really good at but absolutely abhor appals me... But it's really coming down to the wire. I have always been the Lady Who Waits... waiting for time, waiting for money, waiting for Rob, waiting, waiting, waiting. And growing old. By this time, Rob & I should already have our house, have a decent car, be putting money away for eventualities. Not living paycheck to paycheck. Not hanging by a thread, not solely dependent on the goodwill of his parents & my employment. So I started thinking about taking a portion of our soon to be emptied savings & going to school, forcing myself to actually complete a semester or two... but Rob doesn't want to stay in NV while I get a degree of some kind... but I'm afraid that we're going to be here next Summer, and I'll still be waiting.

Enough

I wish all of us enough...

Enough abundance to fulfill our lives
Enough loss to make us appreciate the abundance
Enough laughter, enough tears
Enough love, enough anger
Enough beauty, enough pain
Enough rain, enough sunlight
Enough growth, enough stability
Enough change, enough security

Just enough, that's all. Not too much, not too little. Just enough.