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The Uncensored Version
Nov. 2nd, 2006 08:10 am
This is also sitting on myspace, in a slightly more polite form because my co-workers have access to me on myspace & no one knows I live here, too...
My co-workers sicken me. I had time on my hand and about 7 huge bags of candy & little rubber creatures, some stickers & various other seasonal goodies that I assembled & took to work. To prevent strife & jealousy, I wrote everyone's name on their particular treat baggy or package. Two people, to my knowledge, ended up treatless. One I believe - and she's not well-liked, so I have no doubt that someone took her gift & ate the candy & threw her candle-holder in the trash, or stole it, too. The other, Enrico, has a history of 'losing' gifts & having things destroyed or stolen. He's got to get attention somehow, so I don't entirely believe that someone took his goodies, but they might have. I wouldn't put it past anyone I work with.
Now, I'm not pointing fingers or naming names because I honestly don't know who the guilty party or parties were. I'm also not one to point fingers in earnest, only jokingly... people have this thing about eating other people's food even when it's clearly marked. I've taken to touching my food with my hands in view of a crowded break room, or licking a can of soda... needless to say my germy gustatory delights often go completely untouched. It's just a sad and tiresome behavior - I mean, the EDR has free food - if you're hungry enough to pilfer, you're obviously hungry enough to dare the crappy fare downstairs. I didn't even mention it to anyone beyond the slighted individuals - I apologized to them & will find a way to make it up to them.
Needless to say, I probably won't be bringing in goodies for the entire staff next Samhain. It originally started out as just a graveyard shift thing, but I've got cohorts on swing shift, & if I give something to a few people on one shift, I've got to give to that whole shift, & if I give to one whole shift, I might as well give to everyone, management included. Obviously, my job is more like a very large kindergarten or pre-school than a business populated by adults. But next year, I may find that I just don't have the money or time to be generous.
I just think it's funny. People are mean and thoughtless, and someone thinks they are getting away with something. Whether they took the gift because they just wanted more sugar, or whether they took the gift because they resent the recipient - that doesn't matter. They are walking around feeling smug & possibly self-righteous. Or at the very least, they got that extra little buzz from a Jolly Rancher or some stickers for their kids... But the Universe sees everything. And not a soul bothered to ask me, "Hey, Janelle, do you have any of those stickers/toys/candies left?"
Someone took a gift of my energy from someone I gave that energy to willingly. When someone takes things, that person takes everything attached to that item & the Universe acts as a silent witness. Eventually, it will take some energy back to replace what was lost. It may not seem significant, & it probably won't even seem to be connected to the original theft, but the Universe is constantly striving to maintain a balance.
I'm not really writing this to warn the unsuspecting public that the Mistress of Death & Darkness is out hunting... I don't need to seek personal retribution for petty & small acts of human nature, and I really don't give a fuck-all who took the treats. The point is that I work with some shitty people. The more I work with them, the better I get to know them... and the less I like them. The more I think about how all their shit is rubbing off on me, & the more I want the Hel out of my job. I'm just so fucking tired... It's no wonder I can barely stand to be around myself most nights. I'm constantly on edge, constantly on the defensive, falling prey to suspicion and hyper-awareness, waiting for the stab in the back or the sly pokes and digs at my psyche. For the most part, people suck. And yeah, I sucked, too, when I was a shoplifting teenager. You see what I mean about the Universe & its 'rountuits? I just thought I was done paying some of those debts - it's been almost 20 years... geez.
My co-workers sicken me. I had time on my hand and about 7 huge bags of candy & little rubber creatures, some stickers & various other seasonal goodies that I assembled & took to work. To prevent strife & jealousy, I wrote everyone's name on their particular treat baggy or package. Two people, to my knowledge, ended up treatless. One I believe - and she's not well-liked, so I have no doubt that someone took her gift & ate the candy & threw her candle-holder in the trash, or stole it, too. The other, Enrico, has a history of 'losing' gifts & having things destroyed or stolen. He's got to get attention somehow, so I don't entirely believe that someone took his goodies, but they might have. I wouldn't put it past anyone I work with.
Now, I'm not pointing fingers or naming names because I honestly don't know who the guilty party or parties were. I'm also not one to point fingers in earnest, only jokingly... people have this thing about eating other people's food even when it's clearly marked. I've taken to touching my food with my hands in view of a crowded break room, or licking a can of soda... needless to say my germy gustatory delights often go completely untouched. It's just a sad and tiresome behavior - I mean, the EDR has free food - if you're hungry enough to pilfer, you're obviously hungry enough to dare the crappy fare downstairs. I didn't even mention it to anyone beyond the slighted individuals - I apologized to them & will find a way to make it up to them.
Needless to say, I probably won't be bringing in goodies for the entire staff next Samhain. It originally started out as just a graveyard shift thing, but I've got cohorts on swing shift, & if I give something to a few people on one shift, I've got to give to that whole shift, & if I give to one whole shift, I might as well give to everyone, management included. Obviously, my job is more like a very large kindergarten or pre-school than a business populated by adults. But next year, I may find that I just don't have the money or time to be generous.
I just think it's funny. People are mean and thoughtless, and someone thinks they are getting away with something. Whether they took the gift because they just wanted more sugar, or whether they took the gift because they resent the recipient - that doesn't matter. They are walking around feeling smug & possibly self-righteous. Or at the very least, they got that extra little buzz from a Jolly Rancher or some stickers for their kids... But the Universe sees everything. And not a soul bothered to ask me, "Hey, Janelle, do you have any of those stickers/toys/candies left?"
Someone took a gift of my energy from someone I gave that energy to willingly. When someone takes things, that person takes everything attached to that item & the Universe acts as a silent witness. Eventually, it will take some energy back to replace what was lost. It may not seem significant, & it probably won't even seem to be connected to the original theft, but the Universe is constantly striving to maintain a balance.
I'm not really writing this to warn the unsuspecting public that the Mistress of Death & Darkness is out hunting... I don't need to seek personal retribution for petty & small acts of human nature, and I really don't give a fuck-all who took the treats. The point is that I work with some shitty people. The more I work with them, the better I get to know them... and the less I like them. The more I think about how all their shit is rubbing off on me, & the more I want the Hel out of my job. I'm just so fucking tired... It's no wonder I can barely stand to be around myself most nights. I'm constantly on edge, constantly on the defensive, falling prey to suspicion and hyper-awareness, waiting for the stab in the back or the sly pokes and digs at my psyche. For the most part, people suck. And yeah, I sucked, too, when I was a shoplifting teenager. You see what I mean about the Universe & its 'rountuits? I just thought I was done paying some of those debts - it's been almost 20 years... geez.
