A Prayer

[perzephone]

Great Goddess Caffeina

I come before you as a supplicant
I must turn my back to you in the name of my heart's health
Your power is too strong for one meager muscle
You throw my rhythms out of whack
You constrict my blood vessels
You stimulate me beyond what I can handle
So I must forsake you
At least for now
Until I can get my blood pressure under control
Until the Beta blocker can still my erratic thumpings
Until yoga and meditation can calm my busy mind

You know I love you and I speak only kind words about you
I preach your gospel wherever I go
I have given you daily offerings of sugar and cream and sometimes cinnamon and hazelnuts
I have made great sacrifices from my wages to support you
I don't drink crappy coffee lest it offend you

Please, be kind to your faithful servant
Do not punish me too harshly
Do not make my head pound for days
Do not make me tired and lethargic
Give me a kind and non-painful release from your savory aromatic service.

Amen.