perzephone: (Default)
So, as I've been doing my chakra exercise, keep getting this persistent image in my head. I see two slender hands holding a lotus-flower-shaped bowl and tipping it, pouring sparkling water out of it. Last night, there was a swan in the bowl. The lotus bowl never runs out of water, either - it's a never-ending ocean - and the swan floated serenly inside it all the while.

(I tried to remove a sunflower seed from under my space bar, and now I've lost my Alt button... dammit)

Of course, there is a drawback. Rob, feeling safe and comfy in his golden energy cocoon, does not want to leave my bed. I, having the misfortune of being the outer spoon during our pre-sleep naps, end up with a dead arm because instead of laying down with me for an hour or so he is now sticking around for close to 2 hours.

I work from 11am to 7pm today. I'm so freaking tired. I should have quit last night when the angry screaming woman was checking in.

Anxious

Feb. 10th, 2008 02:52 pm
perzephone: (Default)
Do you ever feel like the Universe is conspiring with you?

I mean, my plan actually worked & Coyote hasn't laughed yet.

Starting with the decision to take the path of least resistance for once & get a degree in the IT field... then I dropped to part time, giving me time to look for other jobs and work on my school. It's also given me time to sort of wean myself from my dependence on the night audit position and a steady income (yeah, it's been kind of rough since November)... It's easy to get comfortable somewhere and then never make changes because, well, it's comfy. I know everybody, everybody knows me. My cube was a safe haven.

And then I get a full-time job with the County (it's only taken me 7 years - about the same amount of time I've been working for the Excalibur (huh, imagine my surprise). And not only is it a job w/the County, it's in the IT department.

Last night I got Vesta from the Goddess Oracle & Frog from the Medicine Wheel. Frog's popped up recently (thanks, Moonvoice :D ), and in the Medicine Wheel Frog is feminine and linked strongly with the rain, cleansing and renewal. Basically, Frog tells me I've cleaned house a little and now it's time for me to get some refreshment and a new start of the soul. Vesta tells me "there have been healthy changes in your household". Basically, the answer to "Why is the Universe conspiring with me?" is "Because it's time".

It's kind of nerve-wracking though. I'm not used to this and I keep waiting to hear Coyote off in the distance.

In other news, I've been working on my chakras a little. When we first go to bed, Rob usually lays down with me & then he gets up & goes to his own bed. I've been laying there next to him & trying to channel energy to give to him. I can't ever start at the base of my spine because I can't break the barrier caused by the kinked vertebrae, so I've had to start with the top of my head. Which opens my brain to all sorts of hypnagogic imagery, but that's ok. I let it flow to my throat & then to my heart. I try to visualize my chakras working like some sort of water wheel of golden light - it fills the crown lotus, which pours into my throat lotus which in turn pours into my heart lotus & then I try to send all that golden flowing healing energy to Rob, wrapping him into a little golden cocoon of safety and health. And then I never get any farther because I fall asleep.

Tomorrow is my first day at the County - wish me luck!
perzephone: (Default)
August 12, 2005
Reservoir Of Strength
The Third Chakra
When individuals experience difficult times, they often find that they possess a previously undiscovered reservoir of strength. In ancient Vedic texts, the third, or Manipura chakra (when healthy) is the seat of that strength, bolstering courage and determination in times of stress and uncertainty. This chakra radiates from the base of the sternum, governing our emotions, will, and ego. When balanced, it blesses one with a profound drive to succeed, authority, integrity, and self-respect. It is active, rather than passive, and helps in the achievement of tasks both great and small. The Manipura chakra may be visualized as a bright, cheerful yellow and is associated with the sunflower and amber.

Because of its connection to the ego, when the third chakra is in a depleted state, it is common to experience feelings of inadequacy, doubt, and rejection; depression and lethargy; and intense worry. Too much energy focused in the area leads to the desire to exert inappropriate control over one's environment. A well-developed Manipura chakra empowers you to grow in positive ways and inspires you to act on your desires. It is possible to exert a balancing influence over the chakra by bringing fire into your life in the form of candles or hearth fires, wearing yellow clothing, and doing exercises that strengthen the muscles of the abdomen and teach you to breath deeply using the diaphragm. You can stimulate an under-active third chakra by burning cinnamon or carnation incense, using peppermint or lemon essential oils and Ginkgo biloba or milk thistle, and exposing the chakra to tiger-eye. The simplest and most potent method of opening and energizing the chakra is relaxing you! r emotional center. Laugh and cry more often, let yourself be more sensitive, and embrace your raw emotions.

Living with a repressed Manipura chakra is like existing automatically, without vitality. Its qualities can be the cause of overwork and excessive perfectionism, but this chakra is more often the seat of free will, goals, personal power, and decisiveness. When nurtured, it can lead you to new heights of spirituality and balance in all aspects of your life.

Sounds familiar, dunnit?

I am so sore today. Yesterday we re-arranged furniture because our den is about to become the m.i.l.'s personal storage facility. Bitch. I plan to rub my nekkid ass all over her antique velvet furniture. Alea called in sick, 3 hrs. before her shift, Kelly called in sick for 5 days, Shirla hasn't done audit since March when she ended my vacation rather abruptly... so in I went. The doctor gave me some Flexiril & Ultracet, which takes the edge off a little better than Tylenol & ibuprofen... It's weird, because the Ultracet dulls the pain from an active ache to a hurts-really-bad-when-touched... So I don't know how bad I hurt til I reach back to rub my lower back & almost puke. Ah well, it's an extra $200, so I can't bitch too much - that's half the rent right there.

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