perzephone: (Default)
I prayed this morning. Prayed for rain. This could get ugly.

I told the Great Mystery straight up that the reason I no longer pray, I no longer ask, is that I'm tired of being betrayed, tired of my Coyote medicine getting involved with everything I try to do. But I gave it a shot - lit some cedar & sweet grass, picked up the rain stick & prayed.

I am constantly confounded by people who choose to live in Florida. Especially people whose houses were destroyed by a hurricane, who then rebuild their house in the same area, and have it destroyed by yet another hurricane. Or people in California who choose to live on cliffsides near the shore... They know their house is going to slide down the hill eventually. Their house slides down the hill... totally destroyed, all their stuff gone. So what do they do? They rebuild. On the same exact hillside, of course. Which is consumed by wildfires later that year, and then it falls back down the hill... There is a difference between persistence & insanity. Persistence means being able to bounce back from a disaster, not letting it destroy your spirit & willpower. Insanity is doing the same thing over & over again while expecting different results.

Finding low-carbohydrate foods is becoming nearly impossible. I am so tired of meat & broccoli it's not even funny. I hate lettuce. To me, lettuce is a useless plant. I'm sure it serves some purpose in the grander universe, but it just starts to smell like rotting garbage after the 9th or 10th salad in a week. I had broccoli for breakfast.

I'm also sick & tired of MCI calling the house. I finally managed to answer the phone & told the agent to take me off of the calling list. It takes 10 business days, tho, so "I may receive more phone calls during this time". Bastards.
perzephone: (Default)

The more they stay the same...

Needs:

I need, more than anything, the Great Mystery.

     I need rain, an end to the drought. I am still a priestess of the land, though the Gods don't talk to me anymore, and I have stopped talking to the Gods.

     I feel as though this drought is the drought in my soul. There is no rain, no relief. Parched, barren ground, cracked, fallen to dust.

     My heart thirsts and all I have received to slake it is a wild fire of frustration and anger. Fruit withered on the vine, leaf shriveled on the bough, all burnt, all in ruins.

     I am truly in the Great Big Empty, a void, an endless horizon choked with red dust and hollow, howling winds.

     Maybe I am growing desperate because the valley spirit is desperate. I yearn towards the thundery days of late July, our little monsoon season. I hope it brings more than the eerie spectacle of heat lightning. I hope it unleashes torrents of rain. I hope it floods. I need to see pools of water on the sidewalks, raging rivers in the gutters. I want to fill vessel after vessel and cover my altar with water in cups and bowls and saucers and vases and urns. I want to hear the water-drum on the porch, I need to hear it squall against the window panes. 

Frog, Otter, Whale, Thunder Beings, Cloud Babies, hear my prayer!

Send rain, send rain, send rain!

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Rainbow Serpent Woman

August 2014

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