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Went to the mall today after work & picked up a Deathnote keychain - it's got the shinigami Ryuk on it and a little red apple, because as we know, shinigami love apples. Ok, yes, now we all know the real reason why I never wanted kids - I want to play with the toys and I don't want to have to share. Anyway...

Me & Rob sat in the foodcourt discussing life, the universe and shinigami, I said something to the effect of, "Well, if your mom dies tomorrow of natural causes, you'll know it worked."

We were on the road after dinner when his mom called & whatever she was telling him had Rob laughing, which upset her - he mouthed, "I don't care what she says, it's fucking funny" at me after apologizing because whatever they were discussing was, "not funny ha-ha but so terrible you had to laugh". From bits & pieces of their conversation I deduced that they are planning to build a landfill quite near the m.i.l.'s house and she is absolutely livid about it. She was bitching to Rob that the city planners were trying to push all the good hard-working money-paying white people out of the neighborhoods and hoping all the black people would move in. Now, how a landfill is going to make property more attractive to black people is beyond me, but this is how my racist pig of a m.i.l. thinks. Then she started complaining about bacteria & medical waste and the garbage trucks - which of course are all driven by bacteria-laden black people. Listening to her rant and rave was entertaining, and it was made even more entertaining because she was on speaker-phone and was trying to censor herself - she knows I get pissed off when she starts spouting racist bullshit. She resorted to ranting in German.

So the shinigami gave me the next-best-thing to death - the in-laws are thinking of moving to Colorado. That was a fast-acting little Death God, and he got an apple for his trouble :)

What's even funnier... a couple of weeks ago she called because Alex was wanting some Nazi propaganda records that he had left in his car. I didn't want that shit in my house, and I don't even know what happened to them - if they got hauled off w/the car or thrown out or what, but we don't have them anymore - I wouldn't even touch them & made Rob get rid of them. Anyway, last week she called to tell Rob that a bunch of his relatives were going to move to Idaho. I reminded him that Idaho is still the neo-Nazi capital of the U.S. (no matter how the Idaho government is trying to change that image) & most of his relatives don't sound or act like stereotypical Germans - they sound, look and act like stereotypical Jewish people. Then I told Rob, "So that's why she wanted those old Nazi records... it didn't have anything to do w/Alex at all..."

Happy Beltane, y'all. I had sex tonight, and it was good, and there was photography, but don't worry - it's all on Rob's phone so I can't share. Rob got me Sweeney Todd, too.
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Happy Beltane, y'all, or May Day or Walpurgisnacht. May your May poles all strive skyward and your gowns of green fall downwards.
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Your Birthdate: December 31

Your birthday suggests that you are a good organizer and manager, an energetic and dependable worker; attributes often showing success in the business world.

Serious and sincere, you have the patience and determination necessary to accomplish a great deal.


Your approach can be original, but often rigid and stubborn.

Sensitivity may be present, but feeling are likely to be repressed.

You are good with detail and insist on accuracy, but at times scatter energies.

You're a practical thinker, but not without imagination.

You love travel and don't like to live alone.

You should probably marry early, for responsibility is necessary for your stability.




Marry early, eh?

Anyway, Blessed Beltane, Happy May Eve, Gutten Walpurgisnacht everyone. Today is my 10th Handfasting Anniversary. I think I should have opted out at the end of the year & a day. Ce la vie, I guess. I don't even know if I spelled that right.

I'm on vacation next week - it's scheduled & official. Kelly's gonna have to sink or swim!

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